Unbound

Chapter 23

"It's clean, you know."

Gabriel's comment caught me off-guard. I'd hardly noticed him sitting in the living room when I came in, still rubbing sleep out of my eyes. The smell of chicory coffee turned my empty stomach; he brewed his strong and dark. I stopped when he spoke and tried to impart at least a hint of anger in my countenance, for Odette's sake. But he looked damn good today.

"Your apartment," he clarified. Oh. My heart sank a bit. I hadn't thought about it, nor had he mentioned it since he had me all but pinned against the wall—the absolute last thing I wanted to be picturing in that moment.

"I see."

"I can take you over later if you'd like to look at it." Leaning back against the counter, he seemed at ease. He was the calm version of himself again today, at least for the time being. The tiredness that had been etched into his face and weighing down his shoulders when he came the other night seemed to have lifted. His muscles rippled beneath a thin sweater and his hair was tied half-up. It was my favorite way he wore it—part tame, out of his face, but still wild. Just like him.

"I can walk. Or have Ephraim take me," I said. "I don't want to trouble you."

"I'll take you this evening when you get off." He took his steaming mug and left the room, apparently disinterested in entertaining any further discussion on the matter.

The looming threat of being alone once again with Gabriel had me on edge all day, watching the clock as though I was waiting for something much, much worse than a short car ride. I envisioned myself standing in the middle of the apartment, telling him that I would stay. I'd pack my things and move back in and that would be the end of it. If I pictured it hard enough, and wanted it bad enough, maybe I could manage to be strong when it came time to say the words for real.

But the guesthouse was furnished and comfortable and had a much better view. I didn't have to trek two miles to get to work, nor did I have to wait for twenty minutes for the shower to heat up when I came back freezing cold.

And the guesthouse was close to Gabriel.

I'd be lying to myself if I said that wasn't a factor. I'd tried, but my gut wasn't buying it. Even when I called to mind Odette's hurt, tear-soaked face, it wasn't enough to dissuade me. I was ashamed by that. But when he'd shown up on the doorstep the other night, some part of my resolve had broken. I knew full well that it was unlikely to happen again, but if I went back to the apartment, that slim chance became non-existent.

Despite my attempts to find extra work to do or to convince Ephraim to keep me late, Gabriel knocked on the door of the medical room a mere five minutes after my usual departure time.

"I wouldn't keep him waiting," Ephraim teased. He knew I was nervous; my anxious energy had been irritating him all day.

"I can drive if you want." I hurried to catch up to him as I pulled my coat on. It hadn't snowed since the day before so the roads would still be clear, but with Gabriel behind the wheel the trip would still take twice as long. He ignored my offer and trudged ahead, opening the passenger side door and standing beside it. Impatient, as always.

When he squeezed himself into the driver's seat beside me, I felt his heat hit the left side of my body with a rushing intensity that felt like a gust of wind. I shifted to my right and tried to make myself small, to give him space. He'd pushed his sleeves up to his elbows and his forearm flexed as he put the car in drive. Don't stare. I trained my eyes on the dash instead.

We passed through town slowly and in silence, and with every minute I grew increasingly thankful that their settlement wasn't more than ten miles from one end to the other. Even still, the mere thought of making the drive back had staying in the apartment sounding better and better. The tension in the car—between us, around us—was almost more than I could bear, so palpable on my skin that I could feel it pressing into me.