Unbound

Chapter 33

My heart felt heavy after our date. Everything in me hurt when I thought for too long about my exchange with Aubrey. She was right: I needed to talk to Gabriel about it. If that meant that this would end and he would go back to Odette, then at least I would have a clear conscience. We would both move on, and this would be nothing but a shameful memory. I'd been happy before, and my love for Jack hadn't gone anywhere. I could go back to the way things were.

It was the following evening, and we were on my couch together in silence. The snow was coming down hard and fast outside, the sound of the wind whistling through the forest made its way into the space and played in harmony with the crackling fire, the perfect white noise. Gabriel had pulled my feet into his lap and was absent-mindedly massaging my calves while he read.

Periodically, I lowered my book to peak over the top and drink him in. Despite looking more worn down than ever, he was still stunning. I loved the tiny frown he wore when he was concentrating on something, the way his lips sometimes moved silently to form the words as he scanned the page.

I was startled when Gabriel stood abruptly, dropping his book and my legs as he rose and left the room. I put my own book down and watched him go. At the far end of the hallway, the bathroom door slammed shut. Though he turned on the faucet, I could just faintly hear the sound of him retching. My heart wrenched; I couldn't put this off anymore. Not while watching him get sicker by the day. The conversation had to happen now, before he lapsed into another distant spell. I could already feel the tears welling in my eyes.

He knew immediately when he came back into the room, slightly paler than before but still composed, that I was struggling with something. He tried to divert my attention. "Can I get you anything while I'm up?"

"Gabriel," I drew in a steadying breath but it did little to calm my speeding pulse and churning stomach. "We need to talk."

"About?" He filled himself a glass of water and drank it down before leaning against the kitchen counter to watch me.

"Will you sit with me?" When he took back his spot in the corner of the couch, I turned and sat cross-legged, facing him. "You're not well."

"I'm fine," he groused. "You worry too much."

"You're not fine, Gabriel. You're sick." Another deep breath. "And I know why."

He stiffened. "Go on."

"This isn't right. You're not supposed to be with me." This was even harder than I thought it would be. Every fiber of my being was screaming at me to shut up with an intensity I'd never experienced before, as though all my nerves were firing off at once.

"Aren't I?" He glanced at me skeptically out of the corner of his eye.

I shook my head and squeezed my eyes shut tightly. If I couldn't see his face, maybe this would be easier. "I know you said this wasn't a rebound, but I think it is. Even if you won't admit it. You're supposed to be with Odette."

"Kiera," his voice was softer now. I could tell he'd turned to face me, but I kept my eyes closed. "What are you talking about?"

"She's your mate, Gabriel. And I know you maybe can't feel it, but denying it is making you sick. You can't keep doing this to yourself. I won't let you." My nails dug deep half-moons into my thighs where I was gripping them tightly.

"You don't think I'd know whether someone was my mate?" He asked.

I was backed into a corner now; I had to admit it. My mouth was dry and my tongue would hardly cooperate enough to get the words out. "She told me that you were bound."

Silence. The sound of the wind and the fire felt deafening now. One minute passed, then another. I opened my eyes slowly but kept them down. Finally, he spoke.