What was I made for ?..

Lights Out...

NOT PROOF READ 🫡

Mila POV

As soon as we got back to the hotel, I headed straight to my room. I think the boys could sense something was off but didn't want to press on the situation. I don't know what was wrong with me. I should be happy right? Charles has spent the day being the most perfect husband. Me, Lando and Max had the most amazing evening, we really unleashed our inner children. Me I guess I did a little too much... Lando remembered me, well not be he remembered who I once was Mila Wolff. How could I be so stupid. Why did I think he wouldn't remember.

I always blew kisses to the boys after i'd finish first. They never thought that id win so it was my way of rubbing salt in their wounds, as well as showing my admiration for the boys. They truly were talented but... I was my fathers daughter. Racing was in my blood. Its who I was. When I had to stop, it broke me. It was the last thing I did to hurt my father. Mother made me quit before we disappeared, she made me purposely lose races, run other drivers off the track. She wanted to create the stigma that I didn't belong there and she made it come true. Father stopped offering to take me, my behaviour too unprofessional. It was the last thing we really shared, and mother finally stopped that too. I guess that's why it was so easy to make us disappear. She poisoned any relationship or reputation I had. She killed Mila Bella Wolff. Even know she doesn't exist, I'm now Mila Bella Leclerc and that's all i'll ever be again...

Lando had tried to message me a couple of times. His notifications being the only source of light in my room. I was scared that if I replied he would ask me that dreaded question again "Do you know Toto?" Of course I know him, he's my father! not that he'd recognise who I am anymore. I wasn't his sweet little daughter who admired her father anymore. No. I was ghost who one day left without trace. Not even a goodbye. I couldn't do that to my father I couldn't come back after all this time. What would I even say to him?

'Hi dad, you miss me?'

'Hi dad, its me Mila'

'Hi dad, Im sorry'

Hi Toto, Its me Mila...'

'Hi Toto, Im Charles wife, pleasure to meet you.'

The last one was my only choice, I could never tell him who I was. That stupid contract, my mother truly did work hard with Ferrari to ever keep me from being truly free. The freedom I currently had whilst amazing, was down to Charles. He owned me now, whether he realised it or not. The day we said 'I do', all power had shifted to him, even if he didn't realise. The only loop hole being if someone was to remember me on their own. Lando once again seemed like my escape. I didn't deserve him. He's done too much for me already. Why couldn't I have married Lando, at least then everything would've clicked so much easier.

I look at my screen to see his texts:

Lando 🧡

Hey Mila, Thank you for everything this evening me and max had so much fun x

Is everything ok? You were a little quiet in the car?

Was it something I had said or done? Im sorry...

Is Charles with you? I don't want you to be alone if you're sad.

I hope you're ok Mila, Please text me to let me know you're ok.

Goodnight Mila, Sweet Dreams x

Lando truly was an angel, he hadn't upset me, he actually has made me feel seen. I don't know why I couldn't just reply. I was just scared. I was scared of the everything that Lando is. The freedom that he holds. The light he brings into any room. The light to all my darkness. This boy held a special place in my heart, I hadn't known him long but he was the most important person in my life. I really should let him know I'm ok. I'll message him in the morning, letting him know that i'm ok. I'll pretend to him that I had fallen asleep, he knew it had been a long day.