[untitled.]

distant // svt jeon wonwoo

synopsis: wonwoo as ur husband, worried when you come home late and drunk, and you ask him why he's cold to you (forced marriage trope, non-idol au, angst)

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you blinked when you saw the time as you glanced at your wristwatch and sighed. your phone didn't ping at all with any texts or calls. not from him, not from anyone. the lump in your throat continued to harden, but you swallowed it down with the final chug of the alcohol in the bottle you were drinking from.

where is everyone when i need them?

you couldn't blame them. your friends and family were all busy with their own lives, and even though you needed them sometimes, you never asked. you didn't want to burden anyone, especially when they have to face problems of their own.

you sighed defeatedly. you didn't have to work the next morning, but will have to prepare for a skull-splitting headache. the week just keeps getting worse. it was late, and you figured you should be heading home soon.

was it even a home? there was no warmth of a lover or the laughter of your family. it was just you and wonwoo, and you guys just lived there. two people under one roof.

"i've left the money on the table here, ma'am! thank you," you slurred to the tent bar owner and left.

the short walk home felt like forever, and your work shoes were starting to make your feet sore. you were upset and now pissed. you drank to feel numb, so why were you in so much pain?

your heart ached awfully, like it didn't fit in your chest. you wanted to rip it out and throw it away, or scream and cry until your knees gave out, or grind the soles of your shoes into the gravel until they tore and your feet bled.

but you could do none of that, so you settled for taking off your shoes and walking barefoot the rest of the way home.

despite your resolve to hate him, you couldn't help yourself. your mind ran with thoughts of your husband and only him, who was cold and indifferent to you no matter how hard you tried to be nice to him.

he was nice. he had basic human decency and kindness in his heart, but sometimes you wished he could be more pleasant to you. more romantic, even. you envied the people he smiled at, even though it was to be polite. you envied the random nice gestures he would do for his friends. you envied the strangers he treated like friends, as compared to the wife he treated like a stranger.

though, you knew you couldn't blame him, either. the marriage was loveless and you were forced. it wasn't like you liked each other before this, but it enraged you that you found a way to see past all of that and fall in love with him anyway.

the lump in your throat returned and revealed itself in the form of tears in your eyes while your heart remained painfully misplaced in your chest. with nothing left to give and exhaustion taking over your drunk and tired mind, you let yourself cry as you dragged yourself home.

—

"fuck this shit," you cursed as you struggled with the keys, blinking through the fresh tears that were blurring your vision.

i've never cried this much since i was twelve, you thought, annoyed at yourself.

get it together, damn it.

the door opened finally, and you dropped your shoes to the side, leaning on the wall for support as your entire body felt like collapsing. you were so tired, exhausted of all the life you had to give, mentally and physically. you wanted nothing more than to shut everyone out and crawl into a hole.

you didn't even bother to announce your arrival. it wasn't like he cared, and he was probably sleeping anyway. the light in the living room was on, you noticed, though the rest of the house was dark. a figure you recognised immediately stood, surprising you.