priorities-2

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I take one last look at the stage before grabbing a cab to the hotel. I check out ofmy room in the morning. I contemplate updating Carrie and figure I'm in this too deep, Imight as well. I book a flight at the desk and wait by my gate texting Carrie an update:

Me: Hi Carrie.Carrie: Oh My God, I've been so worried about you, I thought you were followingme back to the apartment. Where did you go.Me: John wants to get back together with me. He took me to Florida, (He playshockey for Florida in the major leagues now) and he showed me a house he bought, forus.Carrie: So you and John are getting back together?Me: We never really divorced. He loves me and yes, we spent a few days catchingup and getting to know each other all over again, and we decided to make a go of itCarrie: What about Slasher and your concerts?Me: John was okay with letting me continue the concerts, but when I told Slasherthat we got back together, he announced on stage that I was leaving the tour.Carrie: He fired you in concert?Me: Literally! Yes, he said I shouldn't take John back because he treated me likegarbage, and if he keeps me on the tour, it's going to take me way longer to figure outhow much of a jerk he really is, so he freed me from the concert.Carrie: How do you feel about that?Me: Devastated.Carrie: Are you in love with John?Me: Yes.Carrie: Are you in love with Slasher?Me: Yes.Carrie: What are you going to do with yourself whenever John's away?Me: I haven't figured that out yet. How are you and Hunter doing?Carrie: Great!Me:BTW Brandon came by John's when I was there (In Florida)

Carrie: And?Me: He's furious. He doesn't know how he'll react if he sees you but he know'syou're alive. He said he was really sad over you.Carrie: Do you think he's coming to the apartment.Me: Brandon? No. He's trying to get a level head. I'm going to send for my things. Iwant to move in with John right away. I can't wait to move into our house. He asked meto marry him again.Carrie: Did you say yes?Me: Technically were not divorced, so technically we're still married.Carrie: That's good isn't it?Me: I asked if we work out can we get married again, this time properly.Carrie: What did he say?Me: yes.Carrie: That's sweet. 

I board the plane to Florida. Life's really thrown me a curve ball, now I have todecide what to make of it. I text Slasher from the plane while we wait for the rest of thepassengers to board:Me: Good luck buddy, I'm going to miss you.Slasher doesn't respond to me which is weird, he always does. I check all his socialmedia accounts and he's removed me from every single one. It's like he erased me fromhis life and he couldn't do it fast enough. I feel completely dejected.When the plane lands, I make a resolution to put the past behind me and make a lifewith John, it's what I've wanted all along. I knock on the door and he answersimmediately, "Hi Rita! What are you doing back so fast, I thought you were going to beon tour for a while."I place my bag down, "I told Slasher about us getting back together and he made abig announcement at last nights concert saying that I wouldn't be touring with himanymore. He doesn't think I should have got back with you after you treated me likegarbage a few years ago.""I'm not like that anymore," he says.

"You don't have to convince him, and if I thought you were, I wouldn't be here," I reassure him. "Can I put my stuff away?" I ask. "Sure, is there more out in the car?" He asks looking over my shoulder. "Everything's at Carrie's, I have to send for it." "We can pick up some essentials if you need anything that can't wait," he offers. "So if you aren't signing with him, do you have any plans on how you're going to keep yourself busy?" "I guess, I'm going to look for an agent, and see if I can do it on my own, I was thinking the entire flight about what am I going to do with my spare time, and that's all I came up with." "I'll ask my sport's agent if he knows anyone who's in the entertainment industry for you," he suggests. "I'd appreciate that," I say grabbing my bag and leaving him to go into the bedroom to start unpacking. "Have you spoken to Carrie," he calls out. "Yes, I just told her what Slasher did to me and that I'm moving back with you." "What did she say?" He asks. "She's supportive, and then she asked about Leonardo. I told her that he's angry. She's very self-absorbed lately." "I don't blame Leonardo for being angry," John empathizes. "Do you think they'll get back together," I ask. "Before the stunt, yes, now, not a chance." I look at my new ring, shining on my finger, picking up every bit of light reflection from all angles, it's stunning. Then I peak out my room to John who's in the kitchen fixing himself a snack, his shaggy blond hair kissing his shoulders, his six pack just waiting to be touched. My high school wish come true, the husband, the house, the income, everything, but for some reason, I still have a slight hollow feeling inside that I can't put my finger on. Later that evening, John and I consummate our relationship like a true married couple. We don't plan for this to happen so quickly, so we don't properly protect ourselves and it's with trepidation that I proceed hoping I won't have any future regrets like the one I experienced when we were younger. If I ever get pregnant again, it will be planned and wanted by both parties. In this particular instance, our relationship although old, is too new. He picks up on my hesitancy, "What's wrong," he asks. "It's just that we didn't, we did the same thing when we were younger and that turned out all wrong." "I'm ready for it now," he assures me. "You're my wife, the one I want to spend the rest of my life with and, I want you to carry my baby more than anything else in the world." "You mean that?" I ask skeptically. "Of course I do," he says cuddling with me. "There's nothing I want more." A few years ago I would have been so quick to believe him, now I'm filled with doubt that's tainting how I should feel. Later that night, I get a text from Carrie: Carrie: Hunter proposed! Me: And? Carrie: We're getting married! (After I graduate of course) Me: Does everyone know? Carrie: You're the first. Me: What about Leonardo? Carrie: I don't want to string him along. Do you want to break it to him? Me: Let me think about it..NO, Maybe John will. "Hunter proposed to Carrie and she said yes, you don't mind telling Leonardo do you?" "Seriously?" He asks. "He might deal with it better if it comes from you." "I'll text him," John pulls out his phone and sends his best friend a message. A minute later the phone rings, John answers it, "She just texted Mya. Carrie asked her to let you know. I don't know, she's probably scared of your reaction and didn't want to string you along again, just get over her already, she's not worth it." John advises.

"I'm so tired of her drama too," I complain to John once he's hung up with Brandon."I know she's my best friend and everything, but her actions are impacting everyonenegatively. 

~~ 

The next day I send for my stuff from Toronto. I text Ted telling him I've beenfired and that I've moved out of the apartment with no intentions of returning and I writea cheque for two months rent so he's not left in the lurch.