priorities-2

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Carrie offers me my old room back, and I graciously accept, it's that or my parents.I shut down, stop eating, stop going out, never leaving my room. Carrie and Ted respectthat I'm in mourning and they leave me alone. Days turn to weeks, I'm gaunt, anorexic, amere shell compared to the happy person I was not all that long ago.There's a tap on my bedroom door, I assume it's Carrie, because Ted went visitinghis parents. I swing the door open wide and standing in the frame is Brandon (John'sbest friend), "Oh my God!" I say in surprise."Rita!" His sympathetic eyes scan mine, "How are you?"My body shakes, and I can't lie anymore, "I'm dying inside." He takes me in hisarms and the warmth of his body disintegrates my resolve. He's the only person I knowwho understands my loss, he loves John too. "How are you Brandon?""Not good," his face is worn."Where's Carrie?""I asked her to give us time. She's worried about you.""I know.""She said you aren't taking care of yourself, barely eating, not showering.""She told you I'm not showering?" I'm aghast."You don't smell," he grins, but his smile turns to tears and my heart breaks forhim."I miss him so much," I cry."Me too," he barely murmurs. "The last time I spoke to him he was so happy to beplaying for Florida. He was bragging because I was skating in Toronto, saying he boughtyou the most beautiful little house.""It was beautiful," I admit, "my dream house.""Are you selling it?""Of course." I grab an elastic and gather my greasy hair in a ponytail, "Can I getyou a drink?""Only if you're having one," he bargains.I shrug thinking he looks as pathetic as I do, "Sure. When's Carrie coming back?""She said she'd be a few hours. Mya, I need you to do me a favour.

Anything," I reply without thinking, "as long as it has nothing to do with Carrie, please tell me you're over her. Ted said you tried seeing her." "I was trying to save our relationship" Leonardo says angrily. "Do you still want her?" I ask. "No, I want to see my daughter, Holly." "She could be Hunter's," I argue. His eyes tell me he's not persuaded, "I think she's yours," I confess. "Will you help me?" "Of course," I take his hand and lead him to the kitchen. It's messy, normally I would be embarrassed, but he's seen the place much worse. I open the fridge while he starts searching the cabinets for drinking glasses. He places two on the counter and waits while I pick our beverage, "There's leftovers here, are you hungry?" I ask feeling pangs myself. "You eat," he says selflessly. I divide it and grab a second plate, placing the first in the microwave, "What is it?" I shrug, "Who knows, as long as Ted cooked it, it should be fine, if it's gross, most likely Carrie cooked it, just spit it out." "All this time, and she hasn't improved," he smiles. "It's for survival with her," I explain. I pull it from the microwave and place the other one in. Grabbing a spoon, I feed Leonardo, watching his expression. It's my way of self-preservation.

"It's good," he tells me. I sigh relief and wait for mine to heat. He takes his usualchair at are six person table. Our apartment used to be the big hangout when the boyswere in the Minor leagues. I reflect back to when Leonardo and I were close and the nextday he broke up with me, I'm glad I didn't harbour a grudge, he wouldn't be here rightnow if I did, "What are you thinking about?" he asks.I give him a blank stare, "nothing," I continue chewing."Come on," he pushes."I was remembering you breaking up with me, telling me it wasn't there for you. Ifyou hadn't done that, I wouldn't have had that precious time with John."He considers it, "I guess you're right," he says appreciatively, "everything happensfor a reason."

Not everything, why did he have to..?" I begin, "Am I terrible for wishing thishappened to a different player?""No, you're not," Leonardo doesn't let me continue, "it hurts to talk about him.""That's for sure," I agree.We finish eating and then we sit on the couch, his arm around me, both of usinconsolable.