𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐓 𝐒𝐎 𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐄
in which, a young german girl comes
to her senses and starts to connect the
dots about her teenage years.
- all quiet on the western front, short story
- paul baümer x fem!oc
- lowercase intended
- all credit goe...
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𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐘, 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓-𝐖𝐀𝐑;
𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐝𝐚𝐲. the gut-wrenching feeling of their words sinking in.
war. war. war.
it was the one word that had haunted her ever since the spring of 1916. it was in her mind when she woke up, ate, slept. she couldn't escape it - she felt like she was drowning under the word. who knew that a singular word could cause a funny feeling to well up inside her. who knew that a singular word could make her feel violently ill.
she didn't know. quite frankly, she felt like she didn't know anything. they were her only friends - she became anti-social, distant and lonely - they had left her behind, right after complaining about being left behind? it didn't make sense to her. did they not value her? did she do something wrong a few days prior that chased them away? what did she do?
she remembered distracting herself the best she could, trying to ignore the growing whole in her heart where her friends once lay - different to now, where they lie in the cold ground, deep within the grasp of no-man's land and the trenches, unable to escape with nothing to keep their bodies warm or to keep the rats away.
decomposing into nothing but a name that was once spoken. they would all be just names with no face behind them, and there was nothing she could do about it. she couldn't stop it. she couldn't help anyone. because they were already gone by the time she closed her eyes.
but, whenever she closed her eyes, only one of the boy's came to mind. paul baümer. he was always the first in her mind - for years now.
she remembered meeting him and being convinced that he was the one for her, her soulmate, and one true love. obviously, he did not show these feelings back until much later, which ada didn't mind. she liked the thrill of having a crush.
the confession was silly. paul had become ada's maths tutor due to her worrying grades in the subject. but, it ended up in a confession from both parties - as it seems, both were horrified but laughed it off after a while.
paul and ada began dating in the later winter months of 1915 - months before he left her for the company of the rats and other men in the trenches. they were only young, but ada had imagined her whole future. both of them graduating college and university and then going off the their respected fields of work. getting a stable job but staying together the entire time.
she was convinced that they could make it work in her mind, so why couldn't they in reality? why did he forged his father's signature, not even sparing her a glance. it made her head spin, her eyes narrow and confusion fill her.
