Illusion | Taekook ✔️

52. Regret

Min Yoongi

Sometimes you are too far gone in your actions that fixing them or coming back isn't an option. Even if I want to repent there would be no use. I might seem strong but I have my weaknesses. Maybe Jimin was right, Jungkook was a better then me. Or atleast he has learnt from his past mistakes perhaps and I am too doomed to learn from my mistakes.

Seokjin was right too but there is no point. After tonight everything will be over. It will be a new day for him and for me. I scoped up one last shot before going out. While I was at counter, my phone rang and Felix dropped a news that I wasn't expecting. I couldn't belive my ears, what if... What if it was truth and I've lost him forever. An ugly feeling started to stir up and I rush to the hospital not caring about my speed or my life.

"Where is him? Where is Jimin?" I shouted entering rhe corridor where Felix was pacing back and forth.

"Mr. Min when I reached there to pick Mr. Park, he didn't answer the door so I had to go inside by myself. I found him bleeding and unconscious in bath tub. He has lost alot of blood and also water has seeped into his lungs. He is in critical condition." Felix sighed.

"No, this can't be.... You are lying. I need to see him right now." I wrestled with him to let me go inside but he held me back.

"No, Mr. Min you can't go inside. Please understand, doctors are taking care of him." he said holding on to my arm to pull me back.

"Noo..... This can't be.... I need to see him." Shock took over my body and I let myself go, slouching down the floor.

Seconds passed by following the minutes then maybe hour or so, no one came out of the room. I usually don't believe in prayers, but I mumbled them under my breath to return him back to me. I won't be able to take this loss. In those moments I regretted alot of things, including my existence.

My eyes were stick to the door of ICU all the time, think if only I could take back all the things I said. It felt like sand is slipping from my hands and I can't hold it back. If something happens to Jimin. I won't be able to live with myself.

The doors of the ICU opened and I rushed toward the doctor coming out, "Mr. Park has lost alot of blood, due to water seeping in their lungs and gut cavity made it worse. His weakness challenged us greatly to remove water. However, we performed the procedure and blood is being transfused. Although, I regret to inform you that we can't say if he will get out of it. His body is fragile and it seem like he hasn't been on proper diet from a long time."

"What...what do you mean.... When will he wake up. Tell me when will he wakeup." I lost my temper. I need confirmation, any kind of hope to see him again.

"See, we should be thankful that he is alive, let's hope for the best because it depends on his body, saying a proper time is not possible for us. I hope you understand." with this the doctor left.

The feelings in those moments I felt can not be described in words. I don't want to lose him. I don't want him to leave me like that. "I want to see him please." I pleaded to Felix.

After talking to doctors they allowed me to visit him, although I don't deserve a glimpse of him but I was dying to see him.

It has been five years since I cried last because I vowed myself that I won't cry until, I bring justice to Iseul. Seeing Jimin's lifeless body attached to numerous wire, made my heart shatter into pieces.

I am the reason of his state. I wish it was me instead of him lying here. I sat by his side and tears rolled down my face. What have I done?

He gave me peace when I was on utter chaos. He absorbed my pain when it was too much for me to handle. He held me close when I was shattering apart. He gave me warmth when everyone gave me a cold shoulder. What I gave him? Hurt? Disappointment? Lies? Hate?