Illusion | Taekook ✔️

67. Broken

Jeon Jungkook

If someone says that they empathize with me or understand what I am feeling now, they are lying. No one could feel what I am going through. No one could see how I am shattering apart.

I spend nights thinking that this my pride, that has brought me to this fate. My concept of family and love proved to be broken. After the death of my mother, my father was my everything. Although he wasn't so expressive but I regarded him. The one who killed the girl I loved.

Namjoon? The person I call my brother. Proved me  my biggest betrayer. We used to play and laugh together, he always used to look after me. Where did all of this go wrong? Where our relation changed. This thought won't let me sleep at night.

And Taehyung? Oh, how would I describe his betrayal. My heart still isn't believing anything he did to me. I loved him with all my heart. He is my husband, the man who was supposed to stand by my side till death. The man who vowed to be there for me till death do is apart, how can that man became my death.

Since that dreadful day, I drown myself into grieve all night. I can't bring myself to believe that it was all an illusion. The mansion was ceased by law. I have been living in my apartment. I still see it as my and Taehyung's home. His things are here and it makes me feel like he is here with me.

The truth is he is not. The other side of bed is empty. I miss his voice resonating within these walls. I loved him so much that I can't bring myself to hate him now. I don't know how much time I spend in nights looking at his pictures and drowning myself in alcohol.

Then morning comes again and I step out to face the world again, like nothing happened. I can't let them see a man broken by his own family. I can't let them see a man broken by love.

All my life Jeon Corp. has been my ultimate dream and goal. It's all gone now. Eighty percent investments have been withdrawn. Many directors have left the company. Share prices have been dropped drastically. I don't know if I would be able to get it back on track, even the half of it used to be.

I can't give up on it. It is my last straw. If I lose the company there might be nothing left for me to live for. However, given the reputation no one would want to invest in it. Even people who were begging for just a small collaboration project won't even eye at company now.

I was regretful, for what I did to Hyunjin. After all of this, I asked for his forgiveness. Being a good friend he accepted my apology. Like always he stood by my side, helping my pathetic self. I came to know that he was in a relationship with Felix, but it had nothing to do with business. It's his life, he can love whomever he wants, however, I am happy for him. He accepted to comeback on his previous designation.

After the court's verdict came, I never visited my dad. I don't think so I would be able to forgive him ever. It is hard to believe he was involved in such a hideous act behind my back. Well, it's for good I won't be able to forgive myself for hurting someone not to mention thousands of people.

However, I need answers from one person. Namjoon. I pushed myself to the prison gates, where he was shifted after his trial and court's verdict. I have been told by lawyer that dad held his and Iseul's secret as a leverage to use against him. If I have a sympathy with him, it's just because he lost his child. Even if it was a mistake, it's still unfortunate.

"I thought, you would never want to see me." He said looking at me. His hair were cut short, a buzz cut and black. He looks weaker than before. His face deprived of the usual aura of stiffness he had.

"I need answers." I spoke. I know I would get nothing by digging out, but I need this for closure.

"What you want to know?" he said, looking at his chapped palms.