queenie//cashton

day 4

" morphine lover make me numb. "

calum pov

annoying voice was late. support group was supposed to have started about 23 minutes ago, and she still hadn't shown up. everyone was happy though, annoying voice didn't provide help to anyone. ashton and i sat in the corner, out fingers interlaced and his hand squeezing mine tightly.

"hey, ash?"

"hmm?" ashton smiled at me and raised his eyebrows expectantly. i don't think i could ever tire of his face.

"i think we should have a redo on that date. seeing as i bailed last time," i smirked.

ashton smiled brightly, his eyes crinkling in the corners. "i'd like that."

"meet me on the roof at 8?"

"or," ashton smirked devilishly, looking around, "we could go now. i mean, no one's gonna notice, even if that bitch does show up, she'll won't even be here for long enough to deal with some kids that aren't here."

i bit my lip, trying not to smile but at the same time trying not to be scared. "what if we get caught?"

"we didn't really do anything wrong, when you think about it. we didn't leave the hospital, so we didn't break the rules."

i grinned, practically leaping up from my seat. without letting go of ashton's hand, i sprinted to the door, smiling at all the other kids who simply laughed. i heard ashton giggle, and somehow the sound made me feel more alive than i ever had been.

ashton and i scurried through the crowded hospital hall toward the elevator, dodging people left and right.

by the time we finally reached the elevator we were out of breath and practically bent over laughing. ashton smiled at me as i caught my breath staring at me with a look that i couldn't describe.

"you're so beautiful," he said softly. i felt my cheeks heat up and i looked at my feet, chuckling nervously.

"i'm not really," i responded, finally looking up at him again. he shook his head, moving closer to me.

"yes, you are calum. you're the most beautiful boy in the world and i'm so lucky to have met you." his hand went up to cup my cheek gently, his gaze burning into mine. i could hear my heart beating louder than it probably should have been, and i felt like i was going to explode.

ashton leaned forward, and i bit my lip in anticipation. and just as soon as anything had started, it was over. the elevator bell dinged loudly and i jumped, startled. ashton scowled and groaned. i couldn't help but giggle quietly at the circumstance as i grabbed ashton's hand and pulled him out onto the rooftop.

"fucking elevator ruined the moment," he grumbled under his breath, and i couldn't help but giggle again.

"maybe you could just.. recreate it," i smirked as i moved closer to ashton. i lightly traced my fingers across his shoulder, my gaze burning into his.

ashton smiled at me, his whole face lighting up and the butterflies in my stomach did cartwheels because, by god was he beautiful. he leaned forward and smashed his lips on mine.

i hadn't really kissed ashton the way i wanted to before. the first one was overwhelming and my heart wasn't in it, and the kiss we had shared in support group the day before was barely a peck. but now, with ashton's lips moving perfectly in time with mine, his strong arms wrapped around my delicate frame and his hands grabbing my hips, i felt like everything was right. my hands reached up to grip ashton's hair, tugging slightly at the mess of curls. he groaned into my mouth and i had never heard something i liked more in my life. i wanted to hear ashton constantly, talking, singing, groaning, even breathing. i just wanted him in every possible way there was to want a person.

my thoughts were interrupted by the sudden feeling of ashton's lips on my neck. i let out a little whimper, feeling him smirk against my skin at the noise. his mouth moved up and down across the side of my neck, occasionally scattering kisses along my jaw line. i squeaked when i felt his teeth lightly nipping at my skin, his tongue soon laving over in the area in apology.

"ash," i groaned, once again lightly pulling on his curls. "more."

ashton pulled back, looking at me with concern in his eyes.

"calum," he said softly, his thumbs tracing circles on my hips. "i don't know how much more i can give you. i mean, i don't want you to rush into something or do anything you'll regret. besides, i mean, the roof of a hospital isn't exactly the greatest place for anything like.. that, you know?"

ashton's eyes were longing and i could tell that he wanted this, but i also knew that he thought i was fragile, and he didn't want to hurt me. in a way it was endearing and sweet, but part of me was angry that ashton thought i couldn't take care of myself. i was a perfectly capable 17 year old boy who could make my own decisions.

"i wouldn't regret something like this ashton," i whispered.

"i.. have you done anything before?"

i blushed. the farthest i had gone with a guy was a blow job, but it was sleazy and i was ashamed of it. i shrugged at ashton, biting my lip.

"have you?" i asked timidly. ashton nodded, looking down at his shoes. i tried to hide my disappointment in imagining ashton with someone else. i opened my mouth to say something, but all that i could manage was a soft "oh."

ashton sighed, frowning slightly. we were silent for a few moments, as if some magical solution would suddenly appear.

"i think you're right about the roof part though," i finally said, letting out a breathy nervous laugh.

"yeah," ashton giggled lightly.

i stared at ashton, and realized once again just how beautiful he was. the way he looked in the sunlight was almost godly. his hair fell into his eyes and face, it gave him a messy look that i enjoyed. i smiled and felt the warmth in my chest as just how strongly i felt for ashton. without even thinking, i leaned forward, yet again capturing his lips with mine. my arms draped themselves around his neck as i felt his hands rest in the small of my back. we stayed like that for a while, just standing in each other's arms on the roof, kissing gently, and i felt happier than i had in a very long time.

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i didn't know how to end this cri

i wanted to add more but at the same time i didn't

21P ARE SO GOOD THOUGH FUCKING HELL I FORGOT HOW MUCH I LOVE VESSEL

-gwen xo