queenie//cashton

intro

" body and soul, i'm a freak. "

calum liked to feel pretty.

when calum was four, he would try on his sister's dresses, and pretend he was a pretty princess. calum's parents blew it off as just him being a little kid and not understanding.

when calum was eight, all the other boys were chasing after girls they liked, and calum was being chased by girls because he was the best at braiding their hair. calum's parents tried to act like nothing was happening.

when calum was ten, his friends were talking about hot girls and watching scary movies. calum was wanting to be those hot girls and watching project runway. calum's parents put him in therapy.

when calum was twelve, his friends were girls, and they were beautiful. calum wanted to be beautiful like his friends, and he started to wear makeup like them. calum's parents threw out the makeup and cried.

when calum was fourteen, all his friends supported him and let him borrow their makeup and clothes. his friends had boyfriends and were happy. calum was bullied, but he felt pretty. calum's parents asked god why they were cursed with the child they had.

when calum was sixteen, he started to wear skirts. his friends would stand up to the bullies for him. his friends couldn't stand up to his parents, and calum was crying and aching inside. calum's parents yelled and hit him, hoping they could give him some sense.

when calum was seventeen, everyone around him was happy, and calum was dying inside. he decided to die outside too. calum took the pills he found in the medicine cabinet. calum's parents found their son barely breathing, and cried the entire way to the emergency room because they didn't know what was wrong with their son.

••

ashton liked to feel admired.

when ashton was four, he would tease his baby brother and anyone around him, telling them that they were big poopy heads. ashton's parents barely noticed they had children.

when ashton was eight, he would play sports and show off to all the girls at recess, and everyone wanted to be him. ashton's parents forgot to feed him.

when ashton was ten, he would steal money from other kids, making it seem like he did it to show authority, but really he just wanted to buy food. ashton's parents still didn't feed him, and now they hit him too.

when ashton was twelve, he would come to school with bruises. people would ask him what they were from, and he would brag the he got into a fight with someone, but he ended up winning. that was a lie. ashton's parents had another kid.

when ashton was fourteen, he realized he liked a boy, and he felt like a freak. ashton stopped really teasing people then, but all his friends still did. ashton's parents treated his younger siblings like precious cargo, but they still never fed ashton.

when ashton was sixteen, he came out as gay. barely anyone at school cared, or at least they didn't voice it, because ashton was intimidating and practically the king of the school. ashton's parents stayed in the dark and thought ashton was straight.

when ashton was seventeen, he was told to stay home from school. ashton's parents found out from some kid at school that their kid was a "fag" and they went too far. the only reason that they took him to the hospital is because ashton's younger siblings cried in worry.

••

neither calum nor ashton thought they would be forced to attend support group meetings at the hospital for a week before being allowed to check out.

calum didn't think he would meet what just might be the most attractive boy he'd ever seen in his life at the support group.

ashton didn't think he would practically swoon over the depressed boy in the skirts at the support group.

but maybe that was just fate.

~•~•~•~
~•~•~•~

calum pov

there was nowhere i wanted to go less than the group therapy meeting at the hospital. there were a few teenagers who had gone through traumas of some sort and the doctored believed they wouldn't recover until they went to the meetings. i was one of those teenagers. i told my doctors and my parents that i was fine, but no one believed me. i had made a mistake, but i felt better. every moment i was at the hospital though, i started to feel worse again.

i sighed as i walked through the large double doors into a room full of chairs and kids in bland clothes. i scanned the room, trying to find someone to sit down by. nearly everyone looked as though they had been brainwashed and wanted to be there. my gaze stopped abruptly though when i saw a tan boy with curly hair, looking as though he felt the same as me. my heart skipped a beat, i'd never witnessed someone so absolutely beautiful. i bit my lip, my fingers toying with the hem of my skirt as i walked toward the boy, sitting down in the chair next to him.

"hi," i said softly, my eyes meeting his tentatively. his eyes were a gorgeous color, i never wanted to look away. he looked me up and down, and i squirmed subconsciously as i waited for the comment on my skirt. he smiled gently at me.

"hey, queenie."

i blinked in confusion.

"i-what? did you just call me..queenie?"

the boy nodded at me, "that i did."

"i.. why?" my eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"because babe," he smirked, "you look like a queen."

i blushed, looking down.

"i-uh, i'm calum," i muttered.

"ashton," he reached his hand out, and i grabbed it and shook it firmly.

"can i ask you something?" ashton nodded at me, and I looked down, "did you just say that i look like a queen because you don't want to be mean? because i'm used to people being mean, i mean, a lot of people don't like gays in general and it's not exactly normal for guys to wear skirts and makeup you know, and i just thought that maybe you-"

"calum!" ashton cut off my ramblings and i bit my lip, "you're really pretty, i mean it." a slight blush crept onto ashton's face, and mine.

"oh-okay, thanks," i looked at my lap.

the door opened loudly and a woman walked in, introducing herself as the leader of the group. she rambled on about how group would work, but i couldn't listen. instead i smiled down at my lap, feeling pretty for the first time in weeks. maybe support group would be pretty good after all.

-
-
-
-
-

this is so awkward and it's only gonna be like 10ish chapters but it's gonna have an unhappy ending I'm just warning you

- gwen xo