Random Frerard Fluff [ONE SHOTS] [COMPLETED]

Why Not

AU CRACKFIC

"Why not?" said Gerard.

"Why not," Frank agreed. He placed the last lot of leaves down. An almost teepee-like creation of branches sat before them on the discolored floorboards; a mock-Christmas tree. Money had been tight that year.

Frank stood back to glance at his arguable masterpiece from afar, and he stepped right into Gerard's embrace. The small motion of arms snaking around his waist didn't catch him by surprise, but he squirmed all the same, a tiny grin sewed to his lips. Gerard mumbled an anecdote of love into Frank's neck and Frank wiggled around in his arms to face his boyfriend-lover-thing. He put a hand to either side of Gerard's face and kissed him; only softly, with no bedroom business intended (much to the fangirls' disappointment).

"Merry Christmas, Gee," he said as he pulled back.

"You know, if this were a movie, this would be the moment when we realise that there's actually mistletoe above our heads," Gerard pointed out thoughtfully. He looked upward and sighed. "Too bad that it's only shitty fanfiction written by a teenage girl who has no idea what she's doing with her life but is quite ecstatic that she has a bunch of readers and would like to thank them earnestly, because she loves them all." Gerard threw a stern glance at the corner of the room where an audience of Frerard shippers were supposedly positioned, breaking the 4th wall as they scribbled an angsty smut scene into their notebooks.

"What?" asked Frank.

"What?" asked Gerard, equally as confused.

"You- just- !" Frank waved a hand. "Are you seeing stuff like in asotm again?"

"I don't know what that is, remember?"

"Ah, alright."

They stood in silence for a while. "You're not actually 30 years older than me, are you? And you're not a priest?" Frank asked suddenly.

"Don't think so," Gerard said.

"Good, just making sure." Frank kissed Gerard again, using a little tongue this time. "Hey," he said, "maybe this is the part in the movie where we realise that you're actually my long-lost twin brother?"

"What, like in StarWars?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, well that wouldn't work, because I'm 30 years older than you."

"Ohhh, okay," Frank said. "That's okay, I didn't want to be Leia anyway. But can we call the dove Chewbacca this week?"

"Sure," said Gerard, fondly watching as Frank picked the little bird out of their weird Christmas tree, her coos filling the room. Then Frank dropped her out of the window and she flew away.

"Fly Chewbacca, fly!" he was screaming.

"Frank!" Gerard yelped. "She was a gift from Vivian!"

"Who's Vivian and why is she giving you doves?"

"It doesn't matter."

"K bae."

"Anyway, that was my favourite dove ever!"

"But it's Christmas," Frank said, "she deserved to be free. Oh, and I was sick of cleaning her shit every day after school."

"Frank, you don't go to school."

"Oh yeah."

Then they proceeded to have some awesome Christmas buttsex, with Santa's bells jingling on the collar around Frank's neck. When they orgamsed, Frank remarked, "Hey, I just remembered - I top!"

"Oops," said Gerard. "It was still good for you though, right Frankie?"

"Of course," Frank said.

They took the Christmas lights from around Gerard's waist and put them on the tree instead.

"Beautiful," they said together, sharing a kiss. It was the best Christmas ever, the end.

A/N

So the prompt for this was "frerard at christmas" (I'll make the dedication when I get on my laptop later) and I tried to put as much frerard in as possible. I wrote this on the bus lmao I have no other explanation (c'mon it was 7am).

always remember,

farnk iero

@Olz xx