"They sat side by side, sad and weary, like shipwrecked sailors on a deserted shore."
― Fyodor Dostoevsky
As long as we are together nothing else matters.
Right?
Shuji's phone rings and he moves away to pick it up.
"Reaper? Where are you?" A voice came from the phone.
Reaper?
"I'm sorry, I forgot. Uhm I'll be there soon just give me a second." He replies and hangs up.
"I'm sorry darling, I have to go." He kisses my forehead and stands up.
I stand also and grab his arm. "Where are you going, ~Reaper?"
Something welled up inside me, it was tight, hot, and red, anger. I scoff and then suddenly burst out,
"What happened to loving me? huh? What happened to figuring this out together?! HANMA IF YOU DON'T STOP THIS CYCLE NOW IT'S JUST GOING TO CONTINUE TOMORROW!!!"
Shuji looks at me astonished. Then his expression changed. Sadness, anger? Stress. I can't tell anymore.
"Y/n please let go." His voice only a whisper.
"No! You're ruining your life!!"
"I CAN'T JUST STOP!!!!!" He suddenly yells.
I let go of his arm, and he walked out. Tears flow out of my eyes running down my cheeks and hitting the floor silently. He was right, you can't just walk out of a gang.
After sitting alone on the floor feeling completely empty I lift my head slowly. I need to get out of my house.It's too stuffy here. So, I do.
I just walk out, wiping my eyes, and head to Leaf's place. I wonder if Leaf and Kazutora know about Reaper? I notice the sky looks more grey than usual and the air feels gross. As I walk by the theatre, the person I saw working there is taking down the poster for the movie we saw. The graffiti rendered it useless even if the movie was still showing.
Why does my chest feel heavy? Almost like my throat is full of cotton, or my heart's a heavy useless rock. My legs are so sore, tired. There is no upside so why should my body feel light anyway, there isn't any buzz to look forward to and run towards.
I turn at the end of the sidewalk and the businesses morph into family houses. Then I stop at Leaf's, a basic grey, white, house. I could never call it a 'family house' for that would be a lie, it's more of a shelter for three strangers, perhaps a few extra friends occasionally.
Usually when someone goes to a friend's house you knock on the front door, but if you knock there at Leaf's house strangers greet you. So when I go to their house I head to the back and knock on the basement door. As I do today. I knock my knuckles on the door, the wood scratching my skin ever so slightly.
Surprisingly there was no answer though. Instead my ears catch the raised voices of an argument.
"KAZUTORA! GOING TO FIGHT TOMAN ISN'T ABOUT THE INCIDENT, YOU ARE ONLY THERE TO GET BACK AT MIKEY!" Leaf yells, then adds sarcastically, "SINCE IT WAS OBVIOUSLY HIS FALT THAT FUCKING DAY!!"
"BECAUSE IT WAS!! YOU WOULD NEVER UNDERSTAND!" Kazutora retorts.
"It's his fault," Kazutora adds quietly, "all his, not mine! not mine! No no no NO, HIS FAULT he, he did this, I never? never, murder?! Never no, I promise..." His voice only grew more hysterical.
"Kazutora," I could hear Leaf and Kazu stand up.
"KAZU!! STOP !! YOU ARE GOING TO HURT YOURSELF PLEASE! KAZUTORA LISTEN!!" Leaf's screams in panic.
"IT'S HIS FAULT!!!" Kazutora rages.
I hear the other door slam and glass break.
I break out of my daze and open the door with the spare key quickly.
"LEAF WHERE ARE YOU?! ARE YOU OK??"
".. over here, I'm fine."
Leaf looks the exact same I did moments ago, kneeled on the ground overcome with devastation. Except the fact they were cradling something in their hands.
"Leaf," I kneel down beside them and put a hand on their shoulder.
Leaf looks up at me as their hand shifts ever so slightly.
Blood. Their hands. Their hands are covered.. In blood.
"LEAF!" I exclaim, reaching out to try and help.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!!" Leaf screams in fear.
I stop in my tracks realising my mistake.
"Leaf, I'm so sorry for moving suddenly." I apologise softly. "I just need to see what you're holding.. ok?"
"Sorry."
"No need to be sorry Leaf, you haven't done anything wrong. I just need to see your hands so I can help you."
Leaf closes their eyes and turns their head, pushing their hands towards me. They are clenched so hard together that their knuckles are white.
"Ok Leaf, I'm going to open your hands now, try to relax."
"I don't want to!" Leaf starts to sob.
"I know, I know Leaf, but I need you to be brave, if you can't do it for yourself do it for me, ok?"
Leaf only nods.
"I'm going to touch your hands." I warn Leaf.
I take their hands in mine and slowly massage their hands to loosen their fingers apart.
Leaf cries harder.
"You are doing great, Leaf."
I finally was able to see what Leaf was holding.
A broken glass tiger.
I stifle a gasp. Orange and black shards are piercing Leaf's hands. So I slowly start taking off the larger pieces, setting them aside. Then I lead Leaf to the washroom to deal with sanitization and the smaller pieces.
Leaf was crying the whole time, even if they were trying to hide it.
YOU ARE READING
How Long is Forever | Hanma Shuji x Reader
Romance"It is not time that matters, but you yourself" ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Crime and Punishment Two teens meet by accident when they both find themselves taking shelter from the rain at the same time. Little did they know what kind of influence they wo...
