The Madness Of Love | The Secret History

XV

This is going to start when Richard wakes up in the morning after Henry, Francis, and Lilith explain to him what's happening with Bunny.

I awoke from a heavy, dreamless sleep to find myself lying on Francis's couch in an uncomfortable position. For a while I lay motionless, trying to remember where I was and how I'd come to be there; it was a pleasant sensation which was abruptly soured when I recalled what had happened the night before.

Last night, after they told me everything, Francis walked out of the room, loosening his tie as he did it. Henry and Lilith played some cards and then she followed Francis out of the room. Henry suggested we play some poker.

I was thirsty. I went to the kitchen, my footsteps echoing in the silence, and drank a glass of water standing at the sink. It was seven a. m. by the kitchen clock.

While I was pouring myself another glass, sleepy Lilith swayed into the kitchen. She didn't look at me, just walked over to the refrigerator and took out a bottle of flat champagne. I took my glass into the living room and she followed me, the bottle still in her hand.

We both sat on the couch, neither of us said a word. I picked up the cards and shuffled them and laid them out again. She watched me silently.

Suddenly, a wave of fatigue and nausea shuddered over me, and I went to the closet, got my coat, and left, closing the door quietly behind me. Lilith didn't say anything.

-----------------

Back in my room, dizzy and exhausted, I wanted more than anything to pull the shades and lie down on my bed. But that was impossible. Greek Prose Composition was in two hours, and I hadn't done my homework.

The assignment was a two-page essay, in Greek, on any epigram of Callimachus that we chose. I'd done only a page and I started to hurry impatiently, writing out the English and translating word by word. It was something Julian asked us not to do.

I finished my composition in less than an hour. After I'd gone through it, I washed my face and changed my shirt and went, with my books, over to Bunny's room.

Of the seven of us, Bunny and I were the only two who lived on campus, and his house was across the lawn on the opposite end of Commons.

He had a room on the ground floor, which I am sure was inconvenient for him since he spent most of his time upstairs in the house kitchen: ironing his pants, rummaging through the refrigerator.

When he didn't answer his door I went to look for him there, and I found him sitting in the windowsill in his undershirt, drinking a cup of coffee and leafing through a magazine.

I was a little surprised to see the twins there, too: Charles, standing with his left ankle crossed over his right, looking out the window; Camilla, ironing one of Bunny's shirts.

"Oh, hello, old man" said Bunny. "Come on in. Having a little kaffeeklatsch. Do your prose composition?" "Yeah" "Which epigram?"
"Twenty-two."

Bunny kept rambling about Greek composition and France in the summer. The twins were studiously avoiding my eye.

"It's almost nine." said Camilla abruptly. "Why don't you go with Richard, Charles. Tell Julian not to wait."

Charles followed me out the door, a few paces behind. We walked through the hall and down the stairs without a word, but once downstairs he stepped close behind me and pulled me into an empty room.

"Lilith called us." said Charles. "When?" "Early this morning."
She must've called them right after I left, I thought. Neither of us said anything for a moment.

"I'm sorry" said Charles, glancing up.
"Sorry for what?"
"Sorry they told you. Sorry for everything. Camilla's all upset."

From somewhere overhead I heard the shriek and groan of water pipes. We looked at each other.
"What are you going to do?" I said. It seemed the only question I had asked of anyone for the last twenty-four hours, and yet no one had given me a satisfactory answer.

He shrugged. "Search me" he said wearily. "I guess we should go."

------------------

When we got to Julian's office, Henry, Francis, and Lilith were already there. Francis hadn't finished his essay. He was scratching rapidly at the second page, while Henry proofread the first one. Lilith was curious looking over Francis's shoulder, whispering, from time to time, something in his ear.

They didn't look up. "Hello." said Henry. "Close the door, would you?"

Charles kicked at the door with his foot. "Bad news." he said.
"Very bad?"
"Financially, yes."

Francis swore, without pausing in his work. Henry dashed in a few final marks, then fanned the paper in the air to dry it.

"Well for goodness' sakes" he said mildly. "I hope it can wait. I don't want to have to think about it during class. How's that last page coming, Francis?"

Henry and Lilith stood behind Francis's chair, leaning over his shoulders. Henry pointed at something on the paper with the end of his pen.
"Francis, you need the optative here instead of the subjunctive."

Francis reached up quickly from his work to change it.
"And this labial becomes pi, not kappa." said Lilith softly.

-------------------

Bunny arrived late, and in foul temper. "Charles," he snapped. "if you want that sister of yours to ever get a husband, you better teach her how to use an iron." Lilith rolled her eyes at that statement.

I was exhausted and ill prepared. I had French at two, but after Greek I went straight back to my room and took a sleeping pill and went to bed.

So I slept soundly and the day slipped away easily. It was almost dark when somewhere, through great depths, I became aware that someone was knocking at my door.

It was Lilith. I must've looked terrible, because she raised an eyebrow at me.
"Why is it you're always sleeping when I come to see you, Richie?" she asked me.

I blinked at her. "Come in" I said. She did, and closed the door behind her. We looked at each other for a long time.
"Are you sick?" she said. I swallowed. It was hard to think what to say, and she look extraordinarily beautiful.

"I'd better go" she said. "I came to ask if you wanted to go on a drive."
"What?"
"A drive. It's all right, though. Some other time."
"Where?"
"Nowhere. Somewhere. I'm meeting Francis at Commons in ten minutes."

"No, wait." I said. I felt sort of marvelous. I stood up and walked to my closet. I found my overcoat, then a scarf. Gloves were too complicated to bother with.
"Okay." I said. "Ready."

She raised an eyebrow. "It's sort of cold out." she said with a small smile. "Don't you think you should wear some shoes?"

I'm terribly sorry for being absent, I've been very busy with uni and stuff this past month. I really hope I won't take a month to write the next chapter x