Uh oh...! // SAIKI K X READER

she borderline on my personality till i disorder

Y/N POV

I'm playing the fun game of avoid Kusuo today. As always, I should clarify he didn't do anything probably. I'm just... not having a fun day. Everything and everyone is upsetting me way more than usual and I don't want to start splitting on Kusuo.

Oh, nevermind, I just saw Kusuo in the hallway with Teruhashi. I know he'd never like her but seriously? I've been avoiding him, yeah, but he hasn't even tried to talk to me. God fucking damn him I didn't like him anyways. He's always been too dull and sarcastic for me anyways. Fuck him and fuck his stupid-ass hair.

He probably doesn't even like me. I mean who would? He deserves better than this. He deserves better than me. I miss him so much, whatever I did to make him hate me I would take it back in a second. In a heartbeat. Why does he hate me?? Fuck him. I didn't fucking do anything he's such an asshole. I can't stand his nonchalant attitude it's stupid fuck him.

SAIKI POV

What the hell is going on in that girl's head today? I haven't tried talking to her yet because all day she's been thinking about how she needs to avoid me, and now she's upset that I'm not talking to her? Don't forget the constant switching between loving and hating me.

For once in my life I'm not sure of how to fix this. As far as I can tell she's in the middle of some sort of episode, and as a result literally anything I do will upset her in one way or another. On the other hand, I know for a fact that she probably shouldn't be alone for the time being. Maybe I should just help from afar? I'm going to have to learn how to help her if I want to be around her long-term right? This is just part of her, and I promised myself to love everything about her.

Oh, I almost forgot Teruhashi was talking to me. Whatever, I'll just walk away. It's not like I don't do that all the time anyhow. The real question is what to do. Is not doing anything the best course of action? I'm not exactly well versed with this sort of thing. I think I read online to be patient, which I plan to be, but what past that?

Well, no time to find out now, she's come up and grabbed me while I wasn't paying attention. Looking down I see that she's.. crying? Last I heard from her thoughts she was mad but now she's sad? Good grief emotions confuse me, but I'm not here to judge her. I let her hug me and I return the gesture, feeling her cling closer to my uniform.  The school day is almost over, but I think I'm going to call us in sick so she can go home early. I don't think the crowded nature of the building is making her feel any better.

I successfully get her out of the school and into her home, all the while she was sobbing at me about all her different feelings and how she's "horrible for getting mad at [me]". How am I supposed to word this? How am I supposed to tell her that I don't care that she was mad? That I love her anyways? Would that make things worse? Better? How do I help her?

"...I'm sorry"

"For what?"

"For being a bad friend. I shouldn't just be mad at you for- I don't know! I just... I don't know! I don't know right now, okay?"

"I'm not upset with you, Y/N, really."

"You sound mad are you mad? I'm sorry I don't know why I'm like this I'm trying to be better I'm sorry"

"It's okay" I say, making eye contact with her, "If it wasn't, I wouldn't be here. I stayed because I love you, all of you. You don't have to explain yourself to me if you don't want to."

She looked at me with tear stained cheeks and sniffled a bit before burying her head into my chest and hugging me.

"I love you so much I'm so sorry" She murmurs.

I'm, as you may know, very emotionally unaware. I don't know how to help her any further so I do what I do best and turn on her favorite show, offer her my drink, and put a blanket over her. Words have never been my strontsuit, but as I feel her breathing slow and her body relax with the comfort of sleep I can tell that it doesn't matter. As long as she is around I will do whatever I can to help her, even if I have to try new things.

Because I love her.

—A/N—

sorry this took forever i also happened to have an episode and then couldnt think of anything so im just going to. Project onto Y/N smile 😊 Love ya! and also short chapter because id rather die than write something long. Sorry Not Sorry
wattpad exclusive note this story gained like 500 reads since my 1k special im so sorry you had to wait. love you guys