MLA's Daughter-in-law

February (23-28)

23 February 1999

I talked with Shrawan about my wish to study further and he seemed happy and said that he will talk with father-in-law.

I can't complain about anything anymore. I am agape about how my parents were against my decision and here is the family that I barely know is willing to consider and fulfill my dreams.

My mother-in-law even praised me for standing for myself. She said that this is the change that society needs the most. She is difficult to understand. Sometimes she is a typical woman caring about beauty and her son, other times she is like a leader. I think everyone has two sides, and they show their different side to different people, most of the time it is due to circumstance and other times it is just the people who are not worth their salt.

So, university admission begins in April or May. By then I could enjoy the things that I want. One more thing, I have two options: either to be a private student or be a regular one. In the given time I can figure out which one is the best for me. However, I didn't talk about my will to join a job with any of them but looking at them I am convinced that they will accept it with open arms as well.

In a nutshell, this is one of the best days of my life.

Yours Vijaya

24 February 1999

This year winter is more severe than the previous one. It is cold outside but this house is so warm. I am not talking about heaters and all but I am talking about the people of this house. All of them are awesome. They said that no one goes empty handed from the MLA's house.

Today I saw a man who had blisters on his body. Some servants were hesitating to serve him food, conceding that he is suffering from a disease that could spread by touching. Before I could proceed and hand him food, my father-in-law out of a clear blue sky appeared and not just fed him but also called an ambulance to admit him to a nearby hospital.

I can't explain in words how much I was overwhelmed by his kind gesture. In this world where everyone is minding their own businesses he is ready to help everyone whether he knows him or not. I am aware many will claim that he is a public servant and this is his duty to look after the layman. Let me tell you, no political leader is clean, all of them do some work and appear kind because they have an axe to grind, however, he is different.

I want Shrawan to follow his footsteps and I want to be with him on each and every stage of his life, supporting him like a pillar, this is the least I could do with all the luxury that is in my lap by God's grace.

I want to always feel this way, I never want to change, even the thought of changing my perception is scary for me. What if in future I become a woman who is blinded by money. Gosh I don't want to end up in hell. I want someone in my life who when I am crossing my limits grab my ear and show me the righteous path.

Yours Vijaya

26 February 1999

Do you know that my father-in-law was the child who was supported by my mother-in-law's father. I can't believe that everybody in Devawas knew about their story and I am a member of their family and I had no clue about it. I don't understand why my parents didn't tell me about it beforehand.

It is not like anything will change after me knowing about their past. I am respecting him more than ever because the rapport he builded in the society is not an easy task.

My father-n-law was very intelligent and he had completed his graduation with flying colors. My mother-in-law was the only surviving child of her parents, she does have siblings but all of them died mysteriously, that's why her father wanted someone as his son-in-law who would stay with him and look after his property and daughter. When he met Deendayal ji for the first time, despite his poor background, he liked him for his daughter. Of Course the caste was not a problem otherwise he would have never accepted him.

Casteism is a huge problem and I don't think this problem is getting its solution at least not at the time till I am alive. Thinking about it, what would be the Shrawan reaction when our children want to have inter-caste marriage. I think I will allow them but I don't know his thoughts on this topic.

Vijaya the way your relationship is going I don't think you are going to be a mother any time soon. It's not that I am dying to be a mother, parenting is an uphill struggle and it requires immense amounts of patience and I think I am not mature enough to look after a child.

On second thought, it would be fun. It is exciting to think that a child is holding my hands with its little one. It would be a blessing. Now I want one, should I talk with him.

No you have gone insane Vijaya, someone please save me before I completely lose myself.

Yours Vijaya

27 February 1999

I was sitting with Shrawan when out of the blue he asked me to make tea for us. I was amazed by this suddenness because no one in this household drinks tea. My father-in-law loves coffee, my mother-in-law is obsessed with green tea and my husband lives for black coffee. They are just three members and all of them have different tastes, not only for the drinks but also for food. My mother-in-law has boiled food most of the time, whereas my father-in-law has spicy food, and Shrawan he is more into Sandwich or omelets for morning and then he has something which has meat, although my in-laws are vegetarian they allow him to have it. I am telling you this because it represents how much they care for each other's habits, no one imposes rules on anyone. Looking at the broader picture they really don't need to worry about each other because they don't have to look after each other, they have servants who can cook, clean for them.

Otherwise, it is not possible for a common person to have different dishes for different members of the family. Cooking is easy but cooking different food for every member of the family is a herculean task.

Nonetheless, along with tea we enjoyed pakoras and this time I was the one who made it, although one maid chopped onion for me. This reminds me that she does have a name but everyone in the family calls her Jiji.

If someone is foreign to this culture they might not get the concept of jiji. Jiji is everything, it could be used for any woman, she could be sister, daughter, aunt or anyone. Literal meaning is sister but I think that this is popular only in this part of Rajasthan. I will discuss all these things with you some other day, now I need to spend time with my family.

Yours Vijaya

28 February 1999

Shrawan and I share the same room and most of the time we are together, but these days he is snowed under his work. I believe that he will very soon make his debut in politics, or maybe after his father retires he will look after his post because he spends lots of time with him and he has a sharp mind. Many times when my father-in-law is preoccupied and is unable to go to any place, he sends Shrwan there and people of Devawas consider him as prospective MLA, so they respect him a lot and his voice is considered the voice of MLA.

People are supportive of him, plus there is no real opposition for this father and son duel. I was thinking one day that they are busy in politics and the salary that they receive from the party or as a member is limited, still how they are maintaining such a lavish lifestyle.

I know I shouldn't, but I asked Shrawan because I was curious and he told me without hesitation that his grandfather left fortune and most of it is agricultural land in Punjab and Sri Ganganagar, and there is no tax on agriculture so they do save a hefty sum of money. Other than that they have some hotels in Jaipur and Delhi, which contributes to their income.

I am pleased that they are not doing corruption and sucking on the hard earned money of the poor.

Yours Vijaya