The Melody Of Love & Pain | Adonis Creed

71.

Y/N

"Baby" I called out standing at the doorway of the room as Donnie was laying there watching TV. "D, dinner is ready" I informed walking into the room. "Nah" he said dismissive. "Donnie you got to eat something, you need to take this medication-" I started off as he interrupted me. "I just said NO Y/N" he expressed as I just did a simple nod walking out of the room.

I walked into the kitchen and made myself a plate

I then sat at the kitchen island alone. I looked back in the hallway waiting for Donnie to come out and meet me in the kitchen to eat but he stayed in the room. I started to eat my food going onto Twitter seeing Donnie and I trending  number one and number two WORLDWIDE with drago trending at number three.

I understood why Donnie and Viktor was trending but I didn't understand why I was trending. Maybe because I was his fiancé and my name rung bells too. But then again I was trending at number one so something was going on. I prayed to God my that my fan from earlier didn't leak my address please that was the very LAST thing I needed right now.

I clicked on my name as tweets of people defending me against....Tiffany and Chantelle ?!. "What the fuck now?!" I asked myself dropping my head back.

"Bet you her ass need someone now that her mother is dying and her fiancé was damn there best to death" Tiffany tweeted as she then @ me in the post in the comments section. "At least my mother ain't dying" chantelle then tweeted as I sighed to myself. These bitches always come out when something is going on with me and Adonis. When they found out I signed to roc nation they started picking, one Donnie and I confirmed our relationship they were picking, when I started my tour they came again, "Formation" comes out they going off and mad because I only referenced Jasmine in it, Super Bowl performance come they bring it up again and says it's the worst Super Bowl performance ON TOP of trying to boycott me with other people. Next was finding out Donnie and I were engaged now this fight between Drago and Donnie along with my mother on her death bed......I'm over it. They had to be the literal fan club president of  the "We Hate Y/N society" because ain't no way.

I went out of the tweets seeing tweets from news sources alleging my mother was dying from an unknown illness along with the one sided beef with Tiffany and Chantelle.

I just started eating my food going out of Twitter not responding to them. I finished my dinner and started cleaning up the kitchen. As I cleaned the kitchen up I would catch myself just zoning out from time to time thinking about how I'm feeling and how I been feeling. I turned my head to look around just having a feeling of loneliness. He was in the house with me but I felt very alone and he's the last person I thought would make me feel like this. Arguing is one thing but him being distant, not interacting with me or irritated anytime I said anything was a new feeling and I didn't like it. This feeling made me question A LOT.

I felt a couple of tears fall from my eyes as I quickly wiped them away continuing to wash the dishes. I needed to get from out of here and from under Donnie for a moment which is why once I was done cleaning I was going to go to the studio. I hurried and finished the kitchen going into the room as I went into the closet we share slipping into a pair of flip flops. I walked back out of the closet grabbing my purse and placing it over my shoulder. "Where you going?" Donnie questioned stopping me in my tracks.

I then looked back at him sitting up against the Headboard. "I'm going to the studio" I simply answered. "Y/N it's damn there eleven at night" he brought up. "Yeah I know that" I smartly said back. "So you were just going to walk up out of here?" He asked. "Yeah, you're not talking to me anyway so" I said with a shrug about to walk out but he spoke up. "I've been in the room resting all day what the hell are you talking about?" He questioned as I just turned around fully to look at him. "And when I talk to you, you act like I'm irritating you or bothering you, so I don't fucking speak Adonis" I explained then rolled my eyes. "I'll see you later" I nonchalantly said about to walk out of the room and once again he stopped me.

"Let me tell you I'm going to the gym this time of night" he brought up. "As I recall back in New York you were at the gym this time of night....I came to come get you and what did you do?!" I asked. "Besides I trust you, it's like ever since you been preparing for that fight you haven't been trusting me. I've never even given you a reason not too" I explained. "I'm going, I'll see you later" I said walking out of the room and out of the apartment.

___________

I walked back into the house around two A.M. with the light off and nothing but city lights shining through the ceiling to floor windows. I locked the apartment door behind me placing my purse on the kitchen island and walked towards the bedroom , Donnie and I Share. I heard him grunt in pain from the bathroom as I stopped in my tracks to see if I was going to help but I already knew how he was going to react so I continued into the bedroom leaving it alone.

I heard him continuing to struggle this time trying to open up pill bottle. The sound of pills falling into the sink along with him continuing to groan this time lowly to not make a sound hurt me as I continued changing into my pajamas. It hurts me so bad that I had to be that way and act like the love of my life wasn't in pain but every time I try to be there and take care of him like I'm supposed too he do what he does. All it did was hurt me even more in the end so why try?

I walked over to my side of the bed getting in and throwing the covers over my body. Within five minutes I heard Donnie make his way into the room groaning to himself. The bed dipped behind me as I continued to lay there and stare out of the window. He slowly laid down beside me as I closed my eyes trying to go to sleep but I know this pregnancy insomnia has been kicking my ass since about four months. After about thirty minutes of being wide awake I finally just got up from the bed. "Where you going?" Donnie asked in a small tired voice as I ignored him continuing to walk out of the room.

I sat on the couch placing an AirPod in my ear. "Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you" I sung to my belly. "And I wish on a star that somewhere you are thinking of me too" I sung continuing to rub my belly in a circle. "Because I'm dreaming of you tonight, till tomorrow I'll be holding you tight and there's no where in the world I rather be, then here in my room, dreaming about you and me" I sung feeling that flutter feeling on my stomach that I've been feeling for the past couple of days which according to Mary-Anne and Google it was the baby kicking and moving around. It only felt like flutters because he or she wasn't big enough to where it felt like actual kicking and movement.

"You hear mommy singing?" I asked looking down at my belly before giggling. "This is OUR song Munchkin, I love you so much" I honestly said wiping my tears away. "I did not plan for pregnancy with you to be full of tears and heartache" I admitted. "But When you get here I pray that everything's different." I said slouching back on the couch and putting my feet up on the coffee table. "Whatever I need to do to make sure we're both okay." I added.

My mind eventually was off of the baby and drifted into work. My song that I've been recently working on was pretty much done and I didn't know if I should leave it in the archives or release it because I didn't feel like releasing the other song. I want in that mood to even be releasing it, it also has a video already shot and filmed but I didn't care. With this song I didn't want to kick Donnie down when he was already down but I'm not about to keep acting like shit is peaches and cream either. He acts like he doesn't care so maybe it's time I act like that and let it be a warning because I couldn't keep doing this. I was growing tired day by fucking day, I haven't caught a break since February and it was July only getting worse and worse. I've been trying to hold my tongue, be there for him but I'm almost at that point with him and I don't want to be but we REAL close.