Archie, Darling. A Queer Romance

Archie, Darling. Part 10

24

"I'm not sure I agree," says Ellie combatively, as she undoes her French braids for the second time and starts from scratch. "It's not your fault but you don't have the context to be speaking on this."

"Seriously? How can you say that?" I rebut, "I know more about this than you!"

"Oh, sweet pea," she condescends, turning to me with her braids in one hand "Sam is absolutely the bottom."

"Really??" I say, exasperated, "Frodo is the twinkiest twink to ever twink!!" I am disgusted with her ignorance. "Sam is twice his size and far stronger," I add.

"The muscles do not maketh the bottom," she says, sagely, sitting in front of her mirror.

"That's not a saying."

"It is now," she says, "Besides, Sam does everything for Frodo, he's a total simp." she turns back to her mirror and for the third time begins again.

"Oh my god, you will NOT speak of Samwise Gamgee in this way!" I say, rising from the bed, offended on behalf of the most noble hobbit to have ever lived "He is a good friend!"

"And a good boy," she adds, laughing.

"We aren't doing this, not today," I say with a tone of finality. "We are in a fight," I say, trying to hid my smile, sitting back on the bed.

"Oh, we are?" she says, mischievously, standing up

"Yes. Yes Eleanor, we are," I say, pompously. She cackles at this, losing her braids again.

"That's not even my name!" she laughs "Boy, you're really passionate about this," she says, dropping her hair and sauntering over to me.

"Of course I am!" I say, standing my ground, looking up at her.

"I suppose it's about time too," she says, standing imposingly over me.

"Yep, something had to come between us," I say, gravely.

"Probably time to accept it's the end..."

"Yep," I say.

"Of you!" she cries, diving into me and knocking me back onto the bed.

"Die! Die! Die!" She cackles as I fight back.

"Hey! Get off!" I giggle, "Oi!" I say, flipping her off me and launching into a counter attack. I jab at her sides, making her giggle before she grabs me and pulls me too close to fight back. She wraps her arms around me and holds me against her.

"Give in, give in!" she laughs, stifling my attacks. I laugh as I struggle in her arms.

"Ok, Ok, you win," I say, out of breath "God dammit, how are you so strong?"

"Well, by your muscle theory, it's because I'm a top," she laughs, letting me go. God, I love her laugh; like her smile, it is unfiltered and raw.

"True," I say, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"Let's put this one behind us and agree to disagree," she says "Maybe they're both switches." She's right, it's the more likely answer, I was getting too emotional and ignoring reason.

"Ok, I can live with that," I say, sitting up next to her.

"Cuppa?" she asks, heading to the kitchen

"Love one," I say, following her. Ellie's kitchen is chaos; there's no dishes, and the sink is clean but the household uses the benchtops as the pantry. Every single condiment known to man is spread across the counter. The teabags sit in three different locations and the salt and pepper is nowhere to be found. I'm rarely brave enough to navigate it myself. I rest against the counter as she boils the kettle.