Listen To Me

chapter 12 ⋆ stay with me

Noel

When Mason steps through the door of our empty Sociology classroom, we're ready.

Arden quickly shuts the door and moves to stand in front of it. Mason whips around to stare at him, then he turns back to look at the rest of us. We're gathered around the tables, watching Mason carefully.

He forces a laugh, demanding, "What the hell are you guys doing?"

"What I should have done a long time ago." I move forwards to stand opposite Mason, and his eyes fix on me. "You've gone too far this time, Mason."

"Noel." Mason laughs mockingly, advancing towards me. In my periphery, I see Jax move towards me, but I hold my ground. Mason doesn't scare me. Even if he reminds me of what happened two years ago.

When Mason's close enough to me, I shut my eyes and send my fist in an uppercut towards his jaw. When I make contact, Mason lets out an agonized yell and clutches his jaw with both hands, staggering back.

I stared Mason down, breathing shakily. "You'll repent when you go to hell, and I will too. But that torment can't be worse than the past five years of you."

"Go on, Noel!" Georgia shouts in encouragement, and Emily gives me a similar word. Arden smiles at me from the door, and Jax is by my side.

When Mason tries to charge back at me, Jax grabs his arm to stop him. Leaning in, Jax whispers in a deadly tone, "We know where your stock is, Mason. If you don't want us to snitch on you, then you better keep Noel's secret for her."

Mason locks eyes with me, and briefly, I'm struck by the knowledge that he still remembers. After everyone forgot the reason why I fell from popularity, Mason has one last weapon left in his arsenal.

"So how's Michael doing, Noel?" Mason asks casually. "Should I tell them what you did with him?"

My breath feels static in my chest. Georgia turns to me, and I see the flicker of doubt crossing her eyes. Arden and Emily wait on the side, watching us with bated breath.

I turn, incrementally, to look into Jax's eyes. He's facing Mason still, but his eyes are shifting to mine. I don't want to see the question in them; a question that I know I can't answer. Not yet.

Perhaps never.

I gather my courage, willing my voice to remain steady and cool. "I don't care about Michael, Mason. Even less than I care about you, miraculously."

"It's pathetic, really." Mason continues, determined to fight before going down, but I cut him off.

"Don't you know when you're beaten?" I demand.

Mason smirks, and I know he's going to run his mouth again. I see red, and I'm so angry that I barely register myself striding over to him and soundly uppercutting him on his chin.

When my fist makes contact with his skin, Mason howls and clutches his chin like I've burned him. When Jax lets go of Mason, the latter whimpers and retreats. His eyes promise further tortures, but at this point, I can't seem to care.

Mason whimpers at Arden, who's looking at the bully with tangible disgust in his eyes. "Can you let me out?" he begs.

Arden moves away from the door reluctantly, so that Mason can yank it open and flee. As Mason runs away, my friends move to sit on adjacent desks so we can talk.

As they look at me warily, I commiserate the fact that this should have been a triumph. This moment was our Trojan horse. However clumsily Mason addressed the Michael situation, I can't shake the feeling that some element of it sank into my friends' collective consciousness.

I see the question swimming in their eyes. Who is Michael?

I want to answer, but the churning in my stomach keeps me from speaking a single word.

Then I feel a familiar hand taking mine, and I look up at Jax. His warm eyes are sobered but soothed as they gaze into mine. "You're free, Noel. We did it." he says reassuringly, his voice filling the emptiness of the room.

I sigh, sinking into my seat. "One less thing to deal with."

Arden chuckles lightly, and I look over at him. He's smiling at me, shaking his head. "What, did you think anything that Mason could say will bother us?"

"You're our friend, Noel." Emily says supportively.

I blink, and tears form in my eyes. Georgia gets up from her seat and reaches over to wipe them away carefully, smiling at me. "We don't want your mascara to get ruined."

Seeing these people care for me so much is the wake up call I need. I can go through life without trusting anyone, carrying my baggage in its sea of grief. Or I can take control of my narrative, take it back from Mason and Michael, and this whole school.

I decide on the second option.

I smile supportively at everyone in the room, steeling myself for the most difficult conversation I'll ever have. "Is it okay if I talk to Jax? Alone?"

"Of course." Emily agrees, giving me a hug before she gets up to leave, sending me a quick smile. Georgia follows suit, then Arden trails after them, giving me a lingering glance. I smile warmly at him, and a trace of brightness lights up his eyes as he grins back.

When the door shuts quietly, I sigh and turn back to my boyfriend. Jax is looking at me with trepidation, but his eyes are calm otherwise. The golden hues soothe me.

"Please don't say anything until I finish." I beg him, watching as the anxiety in his eyes increases as I speak. "I don't think I'll be able to get through this otherwise."

"Don't say anything if you're not ready to. Don't feel obligated to tell me if you don't want to." Jax tells me, but I shake my head.

"It's not like that. I want to tell you. I might even need to tell you. But it's just hard." I stare at the floor. Count to five. Then I start my story.

I open with, "I used to be friends with Michael." A sense of dread builds in my heart. "Two years ago. He was good to me at first, and I trusted him. In junior year, we were at a senior party, and he said that he liked me."

Jax watches me warily. A bitter laugh escapes me, thinking about Michael's confession. I was so naïve back then. So stupid. "Michael's confession kept me silent. I know what he did now, but his feelings manipulated me at first. I thought he actually wanted something with me. I thought I deserved it."

"What did he do to you?" Jax whispers, sounding scared. I wait, wondering if the words will push themselves out from my mouth. They linger on my tongue, balancing before they change everything about my relationship with Jax. I have no idea how he'll feel about it.

Maybe he'll think I'm tainted. Maybe he won't want to be with me anymore. Maybe he'll mock me, just like everyone else.

"Michael raped me." I blurt out, a rattled sigh escaping my rounded lips. My eyes are still tightly shut. "At a party last summer. And the whole school knows about it."

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