Eternally

Chapter 2

Lapis - x
"Please take a walk with me?"

My voice comes out more fragile than I intended, but I offer a sad smile as I stand, not waiting for Vergil to answer. I move to the door in the kitchen leading to our backyard, welcoming the sunshine peeking through the trees that offer kisses to my skin and the smell of flowers filling my nose. I sigh contentedly, opting to sit near the small pond near the tree line, gazing into the clear water.
It only makes sense Syrus would be furious and he's always been the passionate sort with his emotions. I just hope he is able to forgive me if he is upset with me, though recalling the way he spoke, I have a feeling it was more aimed at Vergil and his discontent with him overall. As I run my fingers through the cool water, I hear the grass crunching behind me, feeling a warm presence nearby. I glance up and smile brightly to Vergil, who narrows his gaze on me with an astute focus.

"You recreated the forest clearing."

His tone is serious, but I can sense he's trying to be more gentle. I pat to sit next to me and am surprised when he does, sitting much closer than I had anticipated, never breaking eye contact. Was he always this intense? Or did it only grow with time?

I take a moment to study his face and just take in for the fact he really is here and this is not a dream. I thought of this day for a very long time, wondering how I would feel or what I would do. Though I had initially felt flustered and emotional because of his return, I feel calmer now, likely due to being in my element of nature. The only thing that bothers me with this whole ordeal is the thought of my son not being okay with it. I cannot bear the thought of us not getting along because of it.

I take a deep breath as I speak, trying to maintain an even tone. I feel hesitant to over speak.

"Yes, that was one of my most favorite places to be in my young adulthood."
I lace my fingers together on my lap as I stare at grass absently. I have so much to ask and want to say, but feel speechless now. My heart gently drums as the only noise aside from our quiet breathing. The feeling of a gloved hand touching my face is what breaks me from my silent mental torture, producing a gasp.

"I have never been a man for sentimentality or words of kindness," his tone is surprisingly soft, yet still holding its trademark sharpness, "but I wanted to convey that it was because of my weakness I had been unable to realize how much my life could have been different if we had remained together." He turns my face to his and I blush deeply at the proximity of our flesh, his breath dancing across my lips.

He continues, his grey-blue eyes holding a tender expression, "the place I traveled to was not a place I felt you could follow. I was selfish, arrogant, and foolish. After a most recent turn of events, I have been able to reflect a lot on the past and would like to try to rectify and mend our relationship. I understand I cannot just waltz in and expect to be accepted, and I must earn Syrus' trust as well, but I want to try. I will not always be the most warm and you may need to remind me to be more expressive, but I want to become the man I buried deep due to thinking it was a weakness, not realizing I was lying to myself for a long time."

His finger gingerly strokes my cheek and for a moment, I feel I could be swept up with his eloquent words. I feel he is being very sincere, yet, I have so many questions. Nero's existence proves he went to bed with another woman-does he want to pursue a connection with her as well? If that's the case, then why even bother sweetening me up? Would he be willing to prove to myself and Syrus about his commitment to being more involved in Syrus' life? What has he been up to all this time?

I withdraw myself slightly, shaking my head. I want to trust him, I do. I just cannot dare to put my son through this connection if it isn't genuine. He deserves more than that. So do I.