Jake and I. (On Hold)

Chapter 3: What now?

CW: a bit of a fight, but they make it up.

I wake up when the bed creaks and a weight comes into bed with me and an arm wraps around me. It can only be 1 person. It's Jake. I roll a little further away so I'm out of Jake's reach. I turn my back to him. "Hey, Emily, what's up?" he moves a little closer, but I squeeze my eyes shut. He now slides against me, puts an arm around me, I can't slide any further because I'm already on the edge. Jake pulls me to him. He holds me tight, and I can feel his heart beating. He's still hot from his fever, it feels good, and that's why I completely freeze in his arms. As soon as he feels that he pulls his arm away from me. He rolls away and stands up. "Well, I'll leave you for a while, you know where to find me if you need me." Jake said, I feel his eyes boring into my back and then I hear the door slam.

When I'm sure Jake is gone I start to shake. I'm crying very violently. It just won't stop, and I really don't feel good. I don't know what to do, and I can't stop. I feel nausea coming on, and I quickly run to the toilet. I start to vomit and hang over the pot. I hear fast footsteps running towards me, and the door is yanked open. Jake comes in and quickly walks over to me. He grabs my hair so it doesn't get dirty, he rubs my back. I keep vomiting until only bile comes out. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and stand up. I try to get up, but I stagger and Jake quickly grabs me. He helps me to the living room couch and quickly grabs a glass of water, which I drink greedily.

"Shower," I say hoarsely, Jake looks at me: "But you can't even stand yet." I get up, but almost fall over and Jake quickly gets up to catch me. He helps me into the bathroom and turns away from me, I undress and sit in the tub so Jake can rinse me off with the shower head without him seeing me. "Help," I say hoarsely, and I cough, I start gagging again, and Jake quickly hands me a bucket, and all the water I had just drank squirts out again. I hand the bucket to Jake and wrap my arms around my knees. I hand the shower head to Jake and he starts to rinse me off. The warm water flows over my body. And the tears start to flow again, but now in silence. "Don't look," I say to Jake again, just to be sure. 'Yes Yes. I wouldn't dare.' Jake answers. "I've seen naked girls before," he says. I blush, luckily Jake can't see that. I growl and Jake laughs. "Yeah, just laugh, it was probably just your mother or something." I said quickly, and I heard a cough that sounded suspiciously like laughing at me. I sighed, and Jake turned off the water. He handed me a towel. I dry myself while Jake whistles with his back to me. "Stop it, Jake." I say and I see him shrug his shoulders. "Can you pass me my clothes without looking?" I ask, and I see him nod, but he remains standing. I know he's grinning. "Jake, I can't stand your jokes right now, just give me my clothes without looking." I say tiredly. I see Jake stiffen a little at my words. And as he hands me my clothes he mumbles, "Sorry Emily, that wasn't funny, I won't do it again, I thought some lightness would be nice." I smiled and got dressed as quickly as I could. "You can turn around." I said and Jake quickly turned around.

He smiled at me, and didn't help me get up, he just picked me up and took me to his room, he gently laid me down on his bed, and with a groan he stretched his back. He walked around the bed and lay next to me. There was an awkward silence, and after a few minutes Jake clears his throat and I look at him. "What was it exactly?" Jake asks cautiously. I immediately clam up and turn away from Jake. I hear him sigh. 'No matter how carefully I ask, you immediately shut down, I just don't get a chance from you. Just tell me, the faster you'll get rid of me Emily.' Jake says, now I'm dropping out. "As if you're telling me something about yourself." I snap back. "I may not do that, but I promised it will happen one day, and unlike you, at least I'll show what I feel." he says back loudly. "But I don't hide behind a fake name." I shout, standing up and looking at him with a look that could kill. 'And that's because people never give me a chance to be who I am, and I always have to pretend, because otherwise people will no longer accept me or will find me strange, and if I don't immediately tell them who I am Well, I'm really grateful for that. Give people a chance Emily, then you won't have to feel unhappy anymore.' Jake shouts back, but in the end his voice breaks. And he gets up and storms out of the room. I start crying again, and I put on music. I hear Jake rumbling, and then I hear him singing loudly and out of tune to music that is blasting in the living room.