Actor, 𝕭𝖆𝖓𝖌 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖓

7 ; Actor

It was currently just past 6pm, and I had arrived to the same studio room in the JYPE building as the first time. I quietly knocked on the door, and Chan opened it with a welcoming smile. I stared a little as he was wearing a black shirt, and his arms were out. Last time he was wearing a jumper, and I think he should've continued to wear one. I was nearly drooling over his arms. 

He was way more built than I was. He definitely goes to the gym, regularly. His shirt sleeves were hugging his arms beautifully. The shirt wasn't tight, but when he moved to sit down in his chair, I got a peek at how big his chest was too. 

In some ways, I felt somewhat small and less confident in myself. Should I start working out? Do I need to be as big as him to be good looking? Or was this feeling normal? Was it jealousy because he's got an amazing body, or something I've never felt before?

"Do you work out hyung?" I asked as I quietly shuffled my way into a chair beside him, knees to my chest.

"Yeah. Nearly everyday if I can." Chan explained as he opened up the music software, "Usually it's me, Changbin, Han and sometimes Hyunjin and I.N." 

"Ah, that's nearly all of you." I chuckled, so the whole group is probably bigger than me, muscle wise, "How tall are you?"

"Everyone says 5'7, but I actually think I'm 5'8." Chan said, and he looked back at me with my cheeky smile.

"I'm 5'9 hyung." I said and shimmied my shoulders to tease him, and he rolled his eyes with a smile.

"So, regarding your lyrics, or ideas, I managed to write bit of a chorus." Chan announced and I cheered for him quietly.

"Can I hear it?" I ask and he nodded and pulled out his phone.

좋아해서 미안 미안
좋아해서 미안해
맘에 들어 미안 미안
좋아한 게 죄가 된다면

Sorry that I like you, I'm sorry
I'm sorry for liking you
Sorry that I like you, I'm sorry
If liking you is wrong

He read them out monotonal and I clapped quietly. It wasn't much, but it was definitely a start considering he was having a creative mental block, and couldn't come up with ideas. It also didn't have a melody yet, but I was sure that Chan could come up with something beautiful once he gets through the block in his mind. Perhaps he needed some inspiration...

"So far so good hyung, I like those lyrics." I said and nodded to him, "It's catchy!"

"I worried it might be too repetitive." Chan said, "So to get around that, I think I might make it the chorus." 

"Yeah, no melody yet?" I asked him and he sighed before turning back to his computer. He shook his head and we sat in a little silence before he turned back to me with a small smile.

"Sorry Rain-ah, seems nothing about love is flowing through me." He smiled, clearly disappointed in himself and I hated to see it. 

Making songs constantly, and making new instrumentals with lyrics that match, and songs that have to keep with a theme must be hard. It's only normal that an artist like Chan would get mental blocks sometimes. I patted his shoulder and smiled at him.

"Perhaps you just need some inspiration hyungie." I said, "How about next week we figure out our schedules and we go out somewhere?"

"Go somewhere?" Chan questioned and I nodded and sat forward.

"Hyung, let me take you to my place! I'll cook, I know how to cook!" I said excitedly but he hesitated, "Or we could just go out somewhere..."

"How about a nice cafe or restaurant?" Chan suggested, and I nodded even though I was sad he hadn't wanted to come to my apartment. I quite like cooking for people. Though I understood his hesitation, after all, he doesnt know me that well.

"Okay. Which one?" I asked, hoping if I sounded a little sad he might change his mind.

"Don't get it wrong Rain-ah, I just feel a little weird going to your apartment because your way younger than me." Chan said with a smile, and he patted my head.

"There's only 5 years between us..." I muttered, not understanding his hesitation because of our age. It was just a friendly hang out, why did he hesitate?

"I still consider I.N a baby and he's older than you." Chan chuckled, and I pretended to chuckle to and nodded along, "Anyway, there's this quiet place I know about."

I listened as he talked about this small family run restaurant and I nodded along with him. His statement about feeling weird about going to my apartment and our ages made me feel quite weird. I was suggesting it simply because he's my hyung, and I like cooking for people. I didn't understand where his hesitance was coming from. Our ages? He was older, but I don't mind if my friends were older... 

Had he never been to a friend's apartment before?

I was kicked out of my thoughts when his hand landed on my thigh, and he was looking into my eyes wondering if I was listening. I nodded and smiled. His brown eyes were shining under the studio's lights and I looked into them, feeling something deep in my stomach. Was I going to be sick, or was this just embarrassment from getting caught not listening?

"Sorry, what is it?" I asked, my voice nearly a whisper as I felt my ear go red.

"Cute!" Chan said with a cheesy smile, his eyes getting smaller as his cheeks lifted.

My eyes widened at his reaction to my embarrassment, he was cheesing at how red I was and how 'cute' I was. I felt my face get hotter, and I covered my ears awkwardly. I was shying away at him, and for the first time, I felt weird about being near someone. I was always usually confident, and talkative, but I wanted to hide away right at this moment.

"I was asking if Changbin could help us a little bit?" Chan asked as he kept smiling at my misfortune.

"Sure hyung." I nodded and covered my ears with my jacket hood. 

At least I could meet another member of the group. It was a start to get to know them all.