The Silent Killer - Completed

Dr Amelia Peters

No one could have expected this to happen. She was young, successful and healthy. Mind you in our line of work I suppose we should recognise that those things don’t matter. Anyone, from any background can become ill and at any time.

As we rushed back into the OR thoughts were rushing through my mind. What had gone wrong? Was it my fault this had happened? What if she dies? All these question were about to be answered.

Again, only hours after Aoife’s operation, I was back in that same OR smoothly drawing my scalpel over her skin this time in more of a hurry and with one intention – to save not only the patient’s life, but also her family’s. I don’t know where Daniel would be without her. On the outside he is the toughy of the pair who is always there to comfort Aoife. But as I have seen today, he is just as soft and emotional on the inside as Aoife is on the outside.

The surgery was messy. As I didn’t know what I had to do, I needed all my equipment ready if I needed it.  I barely had room to move and in my panic mode I couldn’t think about who it was on the table and had to concentrate on the fact that this body had to be working much better by the time it left the OR.

Things weren’t looking good when I opened Aoife up. One of her major blood vessels had burst and blood was seeping through her body.

“Hang a litre of B-negative. Damn I can’t find the source. Where is it? C’mon where is it?” I screamed with frustration. I searched and searched but only had a short period of time before time was up. If Aoife’s heart stopped I would only have about 5 minutes before she will suffer brain damage.

As time passed I struggled to find the source. Then there is was. Right in front of my eyes the whole time in such an obvious place I had managed to miss it. As I carefully but quickly repaired the vessel Aoife’s heart stopped. “D-fib!”. Everyone rushed around hooking up medications and taking off others. Covered in blood I stepped towards her head dodging the nurse who was giving CPR and whispered, sternly in her ear.

“Aoife I am talking to you and you better be listening and taking in every single word I say. DO NOT dare even think about leaving your family behind. They love you and they do not deserve this. I will never forgive you if you don’t fight. I know you can so don’t even try and argue with me. I know you Aoife. I know you can get through this and I am trying my very best to help you but I can’t do it alone. I need you and remember my first operation here? You were there standing right beside me, telling me I could do it. Telling me I was educated enough and that you believed in me. Well now I am returning the favour. I am here for you. You know you can get through this and I believe you can. Do not let me down Aoife. I mean it if you do I will never forgive you and...”

“We’ve got a rhythm” the nurse shouted.

A tear streamed down my cheek. Was it me that had caused her to fight? Did she actually hear what I had said? No don’t be silly. It was just a coincidence. She was under anaesthetic there was no way she could have heard me.

I carefully and slowly closed Aoife back up. Happy she was in the clear for now. Although it was still in the back of my mind that this could happen again. There was not questioning it. I had saved her this time but as we were always told in Med School, you can’t save everyone.

Watching Aoife being rolled out the room I felt a sense of relief. I could relax for a little while before she woke up. I cleaned myself up and went to find Daniel.  As I entered the reception he scuttled to his feet. I could see the fear and panic on his face. I explained to him that she was ok but made sure to tell him it isn’t over.

“There was a burst blood vessel that was leaking blood through her body. We have managed to repair it but there is a chance it could burst again so we need to keep a very close eye on her. She is going to be in here for a while Daniel. There is going to be a lot of people coming and going. They will be checking her all the time. She may even need to be under constant induced sedation to ease the pain.”

Daniel, never lost for words, stuttered and struggled to get words out. I had never seen him this bad. “What happens if it bursts again?” he said. His face stricken with fear of hearing my answer.

“The worst case scenario?”

He didn’t say a word.

“Worst case – we can’t save her. Still bad but better than that, we need to do a hysterectomy.”

I knew both of these were as bad as each other for Aoife and Daniel. They had always wanted a big family. They wanted to watch their kids run around in a huge garden with smiles across their faces.

“Do you have any more questions?” I asked.

“Can I see her?” Daniel whimpered as tears streamed down his cheeks.

“She has just gone to recovery so I will come back and update you when she wakes up. If she is in too much pain we may have to put her straight back to sleep. If I can I will get you in to speak to her before we do this. I can’t promise anything though.”

I scrunched up my mask and threw it in the bin as I passed it. The hospital seemed eerily quiet. There were very little people about. Then it hit me. My shift had finished 2 hours ago. It must be change-over time for the nurses.

Turning into recovery seeing Aoife caused me to gasp. Why I don’t know because I had seen her only 10 minutes ago. Possibly now I was back in friend mode and the doctor had taken over in the OR. I carefully took her hand and placed it in mine. I could see her eyes gradually flicker and as they opened she looked at me with those amazing olive green eyes. The strange thing was, they weren’t the eyes I knew. I had worked with Aoife for a while now and never had I see her in this state. She still had a tube down her throat so couldn’t talk. I had only seen these eyes on one other person in my whole career. That person stopped fighting. She had had enough and died a few hours later. I squeezed Aoife’s hand tight and through the tears I lectured her again. I told her she was not to give up and that she had succeeded once and could do it again.

“Sarah. Could you go and get Mr. Mathews please.”

“Yes.”

“Aoife, listen to me really carefully. I am going to get Daniel but after you see him we are going to have to put you in and induced coma. You are clearly in too much pain for meds so I think its best. We will try and not make it last too long but I can’t promise anything.”