(Lights slowly rise on two figures making out on the chesterfield.)
TAPE: What followed that night doesn't bear retelling. It wasn't my finest moment, I'll admit, but they say desperate times call for desperate measures... Whether he enjoyed it or not, I'll never know. The morning after came so quickly, there was little time for awkwardness.
(The two figures turn out to be MACLEAN and BURGESS in their fedoras and undergarments. A hard-shelled suitcase lies open on the floor. MACLEAN breaks free from BURGESS's embrace to find a flask in the pocket of a nearby trench coat.)
MAC: I can't keep living like this. What if he doesn't call?
BURG: My darling Maclean, you really worry far too much.
MAC: Bloody easy for you to say. You're not the one being exposed.
BURG: If it makes you feel any better, allow me to expose myself.
(BURGESS moons MACLEAN.)
MAC: You're disgusting and abhorrent.
BURG: You're a drunkard and a letch. If Lavrenty says he's going to call, he'll call.
MAC: What if he doesn't call in time. What if they catch me? What are they going to do to me?
BURG: I suspect they'll tell your grandmum about the dirty pictures you drew in your Cambridge texts.
MAC: This is a very serious matter! Perhaps even one of life and death! ...My life and death!
BURG: Bollocks. If you swoon, I have every intention of taking advantage of you, you maudlin twit.
MAC: I resent that.
(A phone within the suitcase rings. MACLEAN stares at it. It rings a second time.)
BURG: Well? ...Are you going to answer that or are you still too busy resenting me?
(A third ring. MACLEAN picks up the handset.)
MAC: Lavrenty? ...Yes, the line's secure. We're using that Delilah gizmo that Burgess brought me... Yes, Melinda and the kids give their May Day regards, yes...
BURG: Happy late May Day, Lavrenty!
MAC: Yes, that's Burgess in the background... Yes, I was in need of some emotional support, you could say... No, I don't need your emotional support, Lavrenty... No, thank you for offering... Yes, a little drunk, that's true...
BURG: Tell him I'll take some of his emotional support.
MAC: Lavrenty says happy late May Day to you too, Burgess.
BURG: Can I talk to him? I just love his accent.
MAC: No, what I need most from you right now, Lavrenty, is a way out of my current predicament... Yes, I'm well aware that British Intelligence is coming for me... Right now? ...Ten minutes?
BURG: Ten minutes? Bloody hell.
(BURGESS starts packing the suitcase.)
MAC: Well that puts my bat on a sticky wicket, now, doesn't it... That's right, it's a cricket metaphor... Yes, very good... We're all very proud of how British you're becoming, Lavrenty... Yes, I'll be sure to tell Melinda and the kids before British Intelligence comes here to dispose of me...
BURG: Come on, Maclean, ask where the hell he wants you to go!
(BURGESS dons his trench coat and tries to dress the hapless MACLEAN as well.)
MAC: Oh, I'm far too drunk to catch the ferry channel...
BURG: Channel ferry.
MAC: Yes, channel ferry. Thank you, Lavrenty, I do believe that was the drink talking.
BURG: I'll drive him, Lavrenty!
MAC: Let me get this straight. You expect me to lay low for an entire month in France? ...Yes, Lavrenty, I understand that it's better than laying low in Londonland but I had rather been hoping for a dacha on the outskirts of Moscow...
BURG: Tits up, Maclean. We've got to get cracking.
MAC: June 21st... 4 AM at the Hôtel du Robiens in Rennes... Room 325... Fine, I'll see you there, Lavrenty. I'll bring drinks... Oh, how much time do I have before British Intelligence gets here? ...Oh really... That doesn't bode well at all, does it...
YOU ARE READING
The Turing Tape - a one-act play
Historical Fiction"The Turing Tape", a one-act play, is a madcap conspiracy theory about the life and times of Alan Mathison Turing, a brilliant cryptanalyst, computer visionary, and homosexual within the British intelligence community of the 1940s and 50s. The play'...
