" I'm sor-"
"DON'T, JUST DON'T SAY IT. YOU DO NOT EVEN DESERVE TO SAY IT AFTER WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO ME! I BEGGED YOU, SCREAMED AND PLEAD, BUT YOU DIDN'T HEED MY WORDS. THEN WHY SHOULD I!"
I yelled with tears streaming down my face when witnessing m...
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"Maa, why are you crying?"
"I'm not crying, beta(son). Something went inside my eyes. It was itchy, that is why I was rubbing my eyes and it seems to you like I am crying. Now hurry up and finish your homework and go and then let's play with Sharmila, okay dear?"
I was not convinced by what she had said. I was only 12 but I could understand whatever was happening. Her constant breakdowns in the kitchen, self harms on her wrists, bruises on her arms and neck no matter how hard she tries to cover it with make up. And I knew who the reason was. And it makes it so angry at myself that I am unable to do anything to protect my mum and my sister from that monster.
The door slammed open and in strode the monster with uneven steps with a woman who was almost looking naked. Reeks of alcohol surrounded the living room. He was smooching the woman while getting inside. Looking at all this, I felt disgusted to my guts. If I was feeling like this, then what would Maa be feeling?
Maa...
I turned towards her, only for her to show me her back and see that her shoulders were shaking. It doesn't take 2 seconds to note that she was crying badly.
"Honey, why don't we take this to the bedroom?" the woman purred at him. He just smirked and carried her towards his room and closed the door with a thud. Not long later, I could hear sounds coming out from the room.
" Maa, can't we leave this place and live somewhere?" I asked with the tears at the back of my eyes but I stopped them before it left my eyes by blinking.
Turning to face me, my mother had tears running down her cheeks. She crouched down next to me and placed her shaking hand on my shoulder. Her weak attempt at a grin failed to mask the suffering in her eyes. Her voice was heaving with sacrifice as she spoke the phrases I had heard mothers stuck in miserable marriages say many times.
"It's for you, beta. All of this I can take." She answered, her comments a witness to the depths of her love and the burdens she carried for our cause. "I don't want my children to grow up without their father," she said softly while cupping my cheeks.
"But I and Sharmila don't want him Maa, can we just leave from here?" I asked again. My mum couldn't say anything and just teared up.
A gruff voice interrupted our conversation from behind, "If you both leave, then who will clean the house and be my free whore?"
I heard fast footsteps and in a few seconds, he grabbed a fistful of my hair and harshly pulled.
"You coglione! Chi cazzo credi di essere?" He said while slapping my face.
(You fucker! Who the fuck do you think you are?)
"Per favore, lascialo, è un bambino. Lui è tuo figlio!" my mum begged him while trying to pry off his hands off my hair.
