Silver Lining | ʟᴇᴠɪ ᴀᴄᴋᴇʀᴍᴀɴɴ

Chapter 15

I'm still clinging to his body when we slow down in the safety of the forest inside the wall. I let go of Levi when I realize what I'm doing and that it's not necessary for me to hold on to him anymore. He doesn't say a word. We ride through the forest that, despite our many training exercises, is still unfamiliar to me, but the captain seems to know where we're going.

And indeed, after a way too long, too unbearable silence, the trees thin, and I know that it doesn't take long until we can see the castle. Even though I keep trying to put some space between us, when Levi abruptly stops the horse, I slide forward in the saddle, and my chest connects with his back again.

The warm feeling in my chest lasts for only a second before Levi jumps off the horse. "Get off," he says to me, and his voice his so cold that I need a second to adjust.

I do as I'm told, and when my feet hit the ground, Levi steps closer to me. My subconscious tells me to step back, but I hold my ground and stay still. I did what I thought was right, and if he wants to punish me for that, then he can go right ahead. But the captain doesn't punish me. He takes off his jacket instead and pulls the sleeve of his grey shirt down over his hand. His eyes meet mine, and I trust him enough to stay frozen in place when he lifts his hand to my face. With soft and careful pats, he wipes the blood off my cheek and tries his best to clean the wound.

When he pulls his hand away, the end of his sleeve is stained dark red. I don't know what to do with the gentleness with which he treated me or with the sudden change of atmosphere when he looks at me with narrowed eyes again.

"What were you thinking?" he asks suddenly loudly.

I furrow my brows. It seems unimaginable to me that Levi doesn't know what I was thinking.

"When have I ever taught you to turn around when someone gets cut off from the group?"

"I wasn't going to let them take you!" I shout my frustration out; the frustration I've been trying to keep inside ever since he walked away from me yesterday.

"You aren't stupid enough to think that I would let those titans kill me, so why did you come back?

"How would you have gotten back here without a horse?" I ask him in return.

"I would have found a way," he replies, and I completely believe him. "So why would you do that?" he asks, his voice as sharp as metal.

"Because I wouldn't go back to that castle without you."

Levi doesn't answer. It only takes him one, two steps to fill the distance between us and do what I've wanted him to do for so long. His lips are on mine, and it's so much better than I ever could have dreamed. He's rough, forceful, and frustrated - with me, and maybe even with himself for giving in.

He guides me backward until my back hits a tree, and he presses his body against mine. Levi's tongue is tracing along my bottom lip, begging for entrance until I give it. His tongue is skillfully stoking mine, sparks erupting in my mouth, behind my eyelids, in my heart.

His hands on my hips make me forget everything else. They make me forget the titans, the Squad, the danger we were in and will be in again. His hands hold me so firmly, so close to his body, as if he's afraid that if he were to let me go, I would disappear. But what he doesn't know is that I would never disappear from him.

I can't hold back a moan when his thumbs graze the skin under my shirt right above the hem of my pants. Levi lets out a deep sound in return, making my insides melt into a puddle. If his body weren't holding me upright, my knees would give in, and I would collapse to the ground.

"Touch me," I whisper against his lips. "Please."

Captain Levi doesn't hesitate for a second. It's as if he's thrown all caution to the wind already, and once he starts, there's no more room for any doubt. He rips off my cloak, and I take off his, and they land together in the grass. His hands pull my shirt out of my pants, and he pulls it so high that my stomach is naked before him. Levi's hands run along my silhouette, and then he puts his lips to the dark bruises on my ribs that I got from hitting tree branches.

I tilt my head back and moan at the sensation of his hot lips on my injuries. His hands travel farther down my body, I pull him closer to me as he kisses me again, and he shoves his one hand into my pants while the other one grabs my ass and pulls my body into his touch.

My hands have a mind of their own when they fumble with his belt. I open his pants while his hand is still moving in mine, driving me absolutely insane. He steps even closer to me, so my hand is flush against his bulge. My face is in his neck, I'm moaning, panting, sweating. I wrap my fingers around him, and he's moaning, panting, sweating.

When we're done, he steps away to give me some room to breathe because he somehow knows that I need it. I dare myself not to collapse. We both get decent again, zipping our pants and shoving our shirts inside. We reach for our cloaks and make sure that we get our own, so there won't be any questions from the squad later.

"Your sleeve is soaked in blood," I say a bit ashamed. To be honest, I'm really glad that that's not my sleeve.

Levi shakes his head and puts his hand to the side of my face, softly grazing his thumb under my wound. "Doesn't matter as long as you're okay."

He looks at me, and for a moment, I don't dare to look back at him because I'm afraid of what I might find. I'm afraid that his eyes will tell me that it was a mistake or that his lips will tell me the same thing. But he reaches his hand out, and with his index finger under my chin, he turns my head to look at him.

There's no regret in his eyes, but I've never been very good at knowing what he's thinking. Apparently, he feels the same way now because he asks me what I'm thinking.

I can't help but smile. "I'm thinking that I waited a long time for this."

He raises an eyebrow. "And was it worth it?"

With a mischievous grin, I step closer to him, so close that my lips are almost touching his. Just before they do, I lean to the side and whisper in his ear, "Oh, definitely."

There's this half-laugh again, and I damn myself for having missed the sight of it. Levi steps away again and assesses me with dark eyes.

"You defied dierect orders, rode into a horde of titans with no gas and a tired horse and... for what? For me?" he asks, but his voice is soft as if he can't believe that I might do something like this for him.

I nod wordlessly. Because yes, for him. I would do so much more for him, but he doesn't know that. I wonder why he doesn't know that when he knows so much more.

Levi lets out a breathy laugh, shaking his head. "You are unbelievable," he says, then gets on the horse. "You'll walk. It's not far until the castle, but you should get punished at least a little."

I grin because I can't stop myself. "I have some other ideas for punishment."

This time, he laughs and I don't miss it. This time, I get to see his lips stretch and his teeth shine and his eyes crinkle. I get to see all of that and hear the sound as sweet as honey, glazing my skin, cleansing my soul.

"That's not punishment, dear, that's pleasure."

And he rides off. I am frozen solid for a second before I gather myself and follow him on foot.