Akuto Amano The Mind

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People's hearts are made of glass
Filled with hope
Emptied by despair
Glass breaks

///

...

I never knew my parents.

They left in an orphanage when I was born.

The only thing they left me was my name. Akuto, To written witht the kanji for person and Aku written with the kanji for Bright but it could also be the kanji for Evil.

The adults in the orphanage insisted that they meant Bright child, they kept reminding me that my name was given to me out of love, even going as far to say that my parents wanted me to have a bright future.

But they're all liars.

I suppose it was done in good will but their lies were so obvious they might as well just tell me the truth.

My parents hated me; my name is proof of that.

I do wonder though, if they put in the effort to name me, why didn't they just kill me?

Not that it matters why. It doesn't affect me at all, I had no reason to be affected by it – I never knew them.

The years passed by and I grew older.

I'm 7 years old now and still an orphan.

I made a discovery. The adults looking to adopt, always picks the brightest child, brimming with energy and has a laugh that invites happiness.

I was the complete opposite. Quiet. Antisocial. And always had a deadpan look on my face.

I get it. Adults want to be happy so they choose happy children to adopt. Guess my future isn't so bright after all; guess, I'm not the bright child my parents wanted...

I accepted that I would never get adopted. You can't be disappointed if you don't hope, right?

I'll just continue being Akuto.

///

One day, a man asked to meet me. The folks in the orphanage said he was very special man. They said he was looking for a special child, I wonder why he called for me?

The man wore an extravagant suit, with shining gold jewelry on his fingers, and slicked back hair.

The other adults left me alone with him which was strange, we were the only people in the room.

He smiled at me. Not unlike any adult that chose other children over me, his smile welcomed me.

But it also made me feel uneasy. Why? Because there was no sincerity in his smile, all I felt was a facade.

He politely asked me to sit. I did as I was told. In front of us was a table and below it, a board containing 64 black and white tiles with pieces of different medieval shapes on top.

He sat on the black's side and I sat on the white's side.

"Have you played Chess before?"

His voice was calm and friendly but it sounded fake. It sounded like his voice tone was calculated to make me feel at ease – it only did the opposite.

I shook my head, answering his question. He didn't sigh or look disappointed, he merely said "Is that so?" Then proceeded to teach me the rules of the game and opted me to play with him.

As we played, I couldn't shake the feeling of anxiety from being around him. He was certainly planning something but I had no clue as to what it was.

I thought about being direct and simply asking him "What do you want?" But he felt too dangerous to provoke. It felt as if, I say one thing wrong and he'd immediately cast aside the mask and I'd regret ever prompting him to show his face.

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⏰ Last updated: Feb 27 ⏰

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