Burnt Out

☆Scar☆

Ray

"Fuck," I groaned, slightly stumbling back while clutching my throbbing jaw.

"Watch your language," Scar reprimanded, prompting an eye roll from me.

I gingerly rolled my neck, returning to my fighting stance. This time, I focused on guarding my face and maintaining a heightened alertness. Just as I prepared to launch another punch, Scar interrupted, "That's enough for today."

"What?" I protested. "We barely even started," I continued, but Scar paid no heed. He began removing his gloves with exasperating slowness, as if deliberately delaying his response. Knowing him he was doing this to annoy me.

Finally, he glanced at me. His brows were knitted together, and there was a hint of...concern in his expression. Concern? I might be mistaken.

"Clearly, your mind is elsewhere, and it's not good to be in the ring when you're distracted," He said, the concern more evident in his tone this time.

I exhaled in frustration and anger. I was irritated because he was right, but I wasn't about to admit that. I yanked off my gloves and got out the ring. Scar followed closely behind me, but I avoided turning to face him, fearing he might notice the tears welling up in my eyes.

I don't know why I felt like crying.

I was a mix of emotions-anger, frustration, and an overwhelming surge of feelings. It all threatened to make me cry, yet I managed to somehow hold back the tears. He has seen me cry before but I still hated crying in front of anyone, including him.

Scar is my boxing coach. He has been a constant presence in my life for as long as I can remember. He started training me when I was just a twelve-year-old kid, and he still trains me now at eighteen. Despite the mere eleven-year age gap between us, he's become the father figure I've always yearned for. He's strict and protective like a father but at the same time he can be soft and caring like a mother. My real parents are still alive, but our relationship is a tangled web of emotions and complications that I've long struggled to untangle.

"Ray," Scar's voice held a stern note, but I simply ignored him him.

I threw my boxing gloves on top of my duffel bag. I tensed when I felt his hand on my shoulder, gently turning me around to face him.

"Are you okay?" His words came out with a hint of hesitancy.

I'd known Scar for years, but we'd rarely delved into the intricacies of my family or my turbulent relationship with my parents. He wasn't oblivious to the turmoil at home, yet the details remained unspoken. I know Scar cared deeply about me, but he never probed much about my family, a consideration for which I was thankful. Whenever the topic surfaced, it always led to arguments between us.

Snapping out of my trance, I replied almost mechanically, "I'm fine."

Scar shot me a 'I'm not buying that act' look, but before he could say anything, I spoke up, "I'm going to take a shower." He sighed but wisely chose not to push further, knowing that I had no intention of opening up. With that, I turned away and made my way to the locker room.

After my shower, I walked out of the locker room and found Scar sitting on one of the benches. He looked up as he sensed my presence, and I gathered my things, stuffing them into my duffel bag. He stood up and approached me, and I raised an eyebrow as he stopped in front of me.

"Are you joining the championship?" He asked, but the look on his face already betrayed his anticipation of my response.

"No, I have to focus on school," I replied through clenched teeth.

"Is that what you think?" Scar shot me a challenging look.

No.

That was what my mother thought. She had never really embraced the idea of my involvement in boxing, believing it was exclusively for boys. Eventually, she relented, allowing me to pursue it after much persuasion from both me and Scar. I remember the happines I felt on the day she finally consented. Boxing was my escape, a distraction from the pressures of school, my family, and my own thoughts.

"Yes," I lied.

"Ray, tell me the truth. Is it because of your mom?" Scar's voice was firm.

I retorted, "How about you tell me why you disappeared completely for the whole of last year and now you're back, pretending as if nothing happened."

His lips formed a tight line, his eyes flashed with a hint of anger, yet he remained silent.

"That's what I thought," I chuckled bitterly. "I have to go; my ride is here. Goodnight, Scar." With that, I walked past him and out of the gym.

I got into Seren's car and leaned back, releasing a sigh as she started to drive.

"Hey, babes, everything okay?" Seren asked, her attempt at cheerfulness unable to hide the exhaustion in her voice.

"Yeah, I'm fine. But you seem tired," I finally observed. She had pronounced bags under her eyes and an overall look of fatigue. Seren had been different ever since Scar had gone MIA last year, and his return complicated her feelings.

"I haven't been sleeping much lately. I had to finish all the paperwork because once the championship fighters arrive, I won't have time for that," she explained, punctuating her words with a yawn.

I took a deep breath and said, "So I assume you've heard that he's back."

She gave me a small nod and admitted, "Word gets around."

It was inevitable; as soon as Scar returned, his parents must have informed Seren's, and in turn, they told her.

"He's joining the championship, isn't he?" She whispered after a long silence.

I knew Seren probably didn't want to see Scar after he'd ghosted her. If he joined the championship, she would have to see him daily because they'd have to train together.

"He is."

"You're joining too, right?"

"No, I'm not."

"What? Ray, you have to join. You're so skilled at boxing, and this is a significant opportunity for you."

I sighed, "I'm tired, Seren. I don't want to talk about it right now."

"But-"

"Please," I implored, and this time, she didn't press me further.

Soon, we arrived at my house, and I got out of the car. "Thank you for the ride," I said, and she gave me a small smile before I shut the door.