Heartless love

18.

Haseena did not love him and also she never wanted him to love her and his behavior towards her made her sure that same like her he also doesn't love her and she was verryyy okay with that & eventually happy & relaxed that after the mission they both can get seperated easily...

But yesterday night what all he said and did she was veryy shocked & was not able to believe that he loves her because of his cold behaviour which he has always maintained towards her. And she was okay with him not loving her & did not wanted him to love her also... But she did not expected & was shocked to hear all those deep loving words yesterday night from him & all those things that he did, she couldn't believe & next day instead of clarifying everything he just in his same cold behaviour blamed her for everything and said many hurtful words to her....

haseena was not feeling hurt that he does not love... She did this marriage for mission, she don't want him to love her or to care for her or anything else from him... she was happy and okay with him not loving her, not caring for her, always treated her with his cold behaviour..

she was okay with everything but this hurted her he just used her without her consent & not even apologized nor clarified anything that when this marriage was just for mission & was going to end then why did he do all this & then just blamed her for everything when she tried so muchhh to stop him yesterday night...

It was not like she was scared of him to say him or to ask him questions that why did he do all this... She was just veryyy badly hurt, broken & sad because she only wanted to live for nation and did not even imagined anything about this in her life and then all of a sudden everything happened & she lost her virginity without even her consent and also was in so muchh physical & mental pain and her health was also getting veryy worst.. And the thought that what all he did yesterday night couldn't be changed now & by his harsh, hurtful & rude words that he said in the morning was making her health more and more worst...     

       She trying to ignore everything was driving towards thana with great difficulty but all the emotions together inside her was troubling her alot... she wanted to forget everything and focus on her duty & was trying hard to think abt the ongoing case for which she was also called earlier but she wasn't being able to focus & this was making her angry as work is everything for her..

She was feeling veryy exhausted and sad first her self respect got crushed and this unbearable pain was not ready to stop and her decreasing health & now she was not being able to focus on her work also as yesterday night's and morning incident was again and again roaming in her mind and was giving her immense pain & tears started flowing from her eyes & she clutched the steering wheel tightly.... she got so lost in the thoughts that she did not care her hand started bleeding again but still she did not care.. But then she remembered the day when she became police officer and her desh farz..

Haseena's mind.

haseena ab jo hgya tum usse badal toh nahi sakti wese bhi tumhari takleefo se na pehle kisi ko farq padta tha na ab kisi ko farq padta hai aur na hi kabhi kisi ko farq padega... tumhe hurt howa hai ya tum kya takleef aur pareshaani feel kr rahi ho ye bachpan se tum akele hi toh sehti aa rahi ho...
tumhari zindagi aur kismat mai toh bachpan se hi dukh, dard, pareshani aur takleef ke alawa kuch nai likha hai.. bass zindagi mai ek baar khushi mili iss wardi ke roop mai, aur uss din se lekar aj tak zinda ho toh bass ab apne desh ke liye aur bass ek din desh ke liye mar bhi jana hai..
Aur tumne wese bhi soncha tha na bhale hi thode din ke liye hi par jitne bhi din ke liye  tum iss rishte mai rahogi isse ache se aur puri zimmedari ke saath nibahogi apne desh farz ke liye, mission ke liye.. toh tum bass jitne bhi din hai ye rishta khatam hone mai apni zimmedari ache se puri karo..
Tumne kabhi iss rishte se na hi pyaar, na hi care expect ki toh agar dukh mila bhi hai toh usse sehlo kyuke ye shadi mission ke liye ki gayi hai aur tumhe apne desh ke liye ye dard bardasht krna chahiye .... Bass haseena ab iss bare mai aur kuch mat soncho tumne toh kayi dukh aur takleefe dekhi hai ye sab toh humesha aate hai tum bass apne desh ke liye farz par focus karo....

                 But everything that has happened since yesterday was something veryy hugee & cannot be forgotten easily so again what all anubhav did & said flashed in her mind and for her nation's duty she again was trying to compose herself, haseena bhul jao sab kuch... But before she could compose herself again she feltt severe dizziness because of her extreme bad and weak health...

             she tried to overcome her dizziness as she has felt dizziness many times before also but this time it was veryy severe and she wasn't being able to compose herself from fainting and be stable she was getting unconscious but still her good & kind heart reminded her that no one should get injured or face any problem because of her and not being in her conscious mind fully she suddenly applied break so that she doesn't crash her car on anyone....

And again not caring about herself & thinking only about everyone's safety she did not realized that her car was on that road which slightly moves down in which we don't give accelerate as the car could move on itself but as she suddenly & abruptly applied the break the car got slided and so that no one could get harm she immediately turned the steering wheel on her right as  only a tree was there....

          Being in unconscious state usually people first think abt their ownselves but our kind hearted haseena still her mind & heart only thought abt everyone's safety and not her ownself as turning left or straight would have harmed & injured some people & shops..Her car got badly crashed with the tree and her forehead got hit by the steering wheel and started bleeding, she was already abt to faint & because of this accident she within seconds fainted...

         In all those thoughts she did not realized that she has taken a wrong turn and was driving to an unknown place, she has reached somewhere far in Lucknow outskirts and has also forgotten her phone in anubhav's house only.... The people nearby immediately came towards her car and seeing her badly injured immediately called an ambulance and she was taken to a nearby hospital....

In thana everyone started to get tensed as haseena never gets late for her duty & today she still did not reach the thana... They were trying her phone continuously & as anubhav had to discuss something important abt a case so he came to thana and saw everyone worried and tensed... and asked them..

They replied : sir wo ms humesha apni duty par waqt par ajati hai ap toh jante hi hai par aj pata nahi kyu wo abhi tak nahi aayi subah unse baat howi tab toh unhone kaha tha hum pahunchte hai iska mtlb wo thane ke liye nikal rahi thi phir pata nahi abhi tak aayi kyu nahi aur na hi apna phone utha rahi hai...