kill for your love - the hunger games

(091) need and want

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KILL FOR YOUR LOVE.

act three.

(chapter ninety-one, need and want)

johanna mason's cabin, 76 ADD.

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EVER SINCE JUNIPER HALE had first been introduced to Dr. Aurelius, his advice and wisdom had echoed around her mending head. Sometimes, she didn't listen. Sometimes, his voice was just a nuisance. But now, when Juniper sat frozen on the edge of her bed, the morning sun shining into the room, she needed Aurelius more than ever. More than she ever needed anyone. 

("No." Aurelius shook his head as he dropped his hand. "Live freely. Live contentedly. And live peacefully... that's all I ask of you... happiness is something you must find yourself. Something I mustn't ask of you. Something you must ask and find.") 

("Until one wins..." Aurelius nodded. "But really, does one ever win in war?")

("The first step to overcoming that blame and guilt does not involve constantly brooding over it, killing yourself over it. Not sleeping because of it," the doctor continued. "You need to accept that mistake, whatever you made, without any rationalisation. What is done, is done. Mistakes are made to learn from them and if you don't, then you will continue to suffer until you make the corrections. Do you understand what I'm saying?")

("Perhaps, down the road, we may see each other again," he said. "I would hate it for this to be the last time we speak.")

Juniper's brain had caught up to her by then. The events last night did happen, not being some dream that the woman's inner desires had conjured up. Johanna Mason had kissed her. Johanna Mason, Victor of the Seventy-First, tribute from District Seven, had kissed her. The reasoning of why was not important to Juniper however, but rather the way she actually enjoyed it, the way she yearned for more. The way she yearned for Johanna. 

She had been kissed before and had kissed others before, but this was different. With Johanna, it was different. No man or woman in the Capitol could even compare to the softness of Johanna's lips, or the certainty of her hands grasping her cheeks and neck, or the way she pressed her body against hers— 

What was happening to her? 

In. In. Out. Out. 

In. In. Out. Out. 

In. In. Out. Out. 

("... I thought we were starting to like each other..." Johanna whispered, her smirk faltering slightly as she stared at Juniper)

(And she was holding Juniper's hand gingerly, the look on her face twisted with uncertainty as if it was the wrong thing to do)

(And as the Mason woman became focused on the gushing sound of the waterfall, fixated on the stream, Juniper closed her eyes and allowed her head to fall onto the other woman's shoulder)

(And she too dropped her head down onto Juniper's)

She shouldn't have been this enthralled by such a simple action of Johanna Mason's. But this wasn't a simple action. Johanna had kissed her. What was she supposed to do with that? Was she supposed to go downstairs and pretend nothing happened or was she supposed to talk to Johanna about it? The mere thought of that conversation petrified her.