Sender Unknown | 18+ | Jimin x reader | Completed!

40. Come back home

I snuggle my nose against the crook of Jimin's neck and breathe him in while glance over at the phone in his hand. "Yoongi must be proud huh?" He closes his phone and turns towards me to cup my cheek. "Well, yeah. He was right... how are you feeling jagi?" I lean in and give him a soft kiss, trying to reassure him that I'm fine.

The night had been eventful to say the least and I have never been more scared in my entire life. Feeling that stabbing pain, not knowing what caused it made me feel so helpless and it's only going to get worse, he will never be able to leave us to go on tour or not come home at the end of the day. He loves to deeply. To much.

I pull back a few inches from his face and feel a slight sting behind my eyes, I exhale and grab his small hands. "Jimin, I'm sorry that you had to leave the guys, the concert, army... I should have stayed in Seoul... I'm already ruining your work and it will only get worse"

He shakes his head and kisses the back of my hand. "Y/N, you have to stop feeling guilty about everything that happens. It hurts me when you say stuff like this. I begged you to keep going, to let me have a chance at becoming a father. I love you but please stop this because you are breaking my heart." Jimin's word comes out blunt and honest, to much for my confused state to handle.

"Jimin... I... I don't..." Is all I manage to get out before completely falling apart. "I was so scared... I thought I was going to loose the baby... that the stress of the flight, the incident back at hybe... everything!" 

Seeing you this upset makes him panic. Not being prepared of you breaking down like this in front of him he quickly leans over your body to unclasp your seat belt and lifts you up onto his lap. Jimin holds you tight, wishing he could take all your pain and worry away, wondering if there is any way for you to feel safe being with him.

After my breathing calmed down a bit and my sobs resided to a soft sniffle he tilts my head up to meet his eyes. "We're having a boy." 

My heart clenches when looking at the man I love as I'm slowly realizing that this can never end the way he envisioned it to. We are never going to live quietly watching our son grow up. Never going to be able to eat dinner comfortably in a restaurant or take a walk down the street. It's just not possible. Not for us.

A tear rolls down his cheek and he smiles proudly. "I would do anything for you Y/N, don't you know that by now? I can't live without you."

I manage to nod before relaxing back into his chest and I don't know when but somewhere in downtown Los Angeles I drifted off into sleep.

Jimin noticed that something was off when we got back to the hotel but he let me be when I declined his offer to help me get out of my clothes. He left for a few minutes while I got ready for the night, my guess is that he went to give the guys an update. I felt his eyes on me when he got back and climbed into bed next to me. In shame I turned around so that I wouldn't have to face him and all he did in response was to cover me with the comforter, kiss the top off my head and whisper softly in my ear "saranghae" 

I cried myself to sleep that night, hoping he wouldn't hear me as my soul broke into a million pieces.

***

I spent the last week in LA in agony, trying not to alert anyone to my conflicting thoughts. All the members kept telling me how happy they were about the new of us having a boy, how much they looked forward to meeting him for the first time, breaking my heart one smile at a time. Iseul on the other hand knows me too well, she knew the morning after our night at the hospital that something was wrong but she managed to give me space and always gave me reassuring looks at every interaction.