Saving Bucky

Oh god...say it again

Bucky's POV:

She's staring up at me, tears in her eyes and I'm feeling guilty. Guilty that in this moment, she's about to break. But I have never felt more at home. She's my home. It's the first time I have felt like I have one in decades. She's a mess. Hair is up in a loose bun, she's wearing nothing but an oversized hoodie of mine. She's beautiful.

I can feel her shivering, I see the anger in her eyes. She's trying to mask it but, I see through it. She keeps looking away from me, and trying to stop the tears from coming.

Bucky: "Don't hide from me, Liv. You're angry. Let it out"

Olivia: "I can't"

Bucky: "It helps, I promise"

Olivia: "NO!" She yells, then gently puts her hands on my chest, looking up at me with guilt.
"He...Ug he said..that if you had to see this side of me..you'd run. Just like he did"

Bucky: "Who is he?" She had to be talking about her ex. What the hell happened?

Olivia: "Doesn't matter" she whispers. "He's not wrong"

Bucky: "Liv...I love you. I'm not going anywhere. Let it out."

Olivia: "No Bucky...you don't understand...it's not anger. It's rage. I would be taking my rage out on you, and you don't deserve that." She tries to walk away from me but I grab her arm and pull her into me again, holding her tight.

Bucky: "I can take it. I don't care about him, I care about you." She looks back up at me, rage and tears starting to pour back out. She's so close. "And I need you to be ok, so if that means you need to break...Liv, I need you to break..." the tears fall, she's gripping my shirt, about to fall off that edge. "I'm right here baby...let go...I've got you".

She breaks, falling to the ground, taking me with her, and lets out a painful scream.

She's fighting to get out of my arms, and I'm fighting to keep her there. "I've got you" I whisper. She's pushing against me and I just tighten my hold. She's reaching her arms around and hitting mine while she sobs. All I can think is....I'm going to kill him.

Olivia's POV:

I'm on the floor, in an exhausted, tear and rage soaked mess. I gave up fighting him. I let go, and just sobbed while he held me.

When my cries finally slowed, without a word, he picked me up, and carried me to bed. He climbed in and sat beside me. I sit up, and turn to face him. I needed to see him. I need to look at his beautiful face.

His eyes searched mine, roamed my face. His hand came up and brushed my cheek, wiping away the tears. and I felt it. I felt the shift, the calm wash over me. He gave me something tonight that I have never had. A safe space. I closed my eyes, took a breath, and looked back at him again, giving him a small smile.

Bucky: "hi baby" he whispered, as a smile spread on his face.

Olivia: "how can you smile like that when I just hit you...repeatedly" I ask, almost laughing.

Bucky: "Because....I have you back in my arms. I missed you Liv...."

Olivia: "God I missed you too." I whisper, gripping his shirt again, pulling myself as close to him as I can get. "James...."

Bucky: "Yea?"

Olivia: "Thank you...."

Bucky: "For what?" He asks

I look up at him, "for giving me a safe space"

Bucky's POV:

That's all I wanted. I wanted to be her safe space. And her saying the words made my heart burst and break at the same time.

Olivia: "I just...."

Bucky: "Liv...."

Olivia: "It...it means the world...."

Bucky: "Liv....." I try to cut her off again.

Olivia: "I'm sorry if I..."

Bucky: "Baby stop talking"

She stopped and stared at me for a moment.

Bucky: "I haven't kissed you in a week...", I see a smile start to creep on her face, and I couldn't help but return the smile. "So shut up and kiss me before I lose it"

She crashes her lips into mine, and it's Heaven. God I missed her so fucking much. Her hands are in my hair, holding me to her, and don't ever want to let her go. She climbs on to me, straddling my lap, and clings to my neck. She has never hugged me this tight, and I could die happy right now. "Bucky?" I hear her mumble against my neck.

Bucky: "yes baby?"

Olivia: "Say it again...." She leans up and asks me...tears and uncertainty in her eyes. She needs reassurance, and I will give it to her everyday if that's what it takes. I gently grab her face, pull her close to mine, look her in her eyes and whisper, "I love you" leaning in, kissing her soft....gentle.

A small, sexy little whimper leaves her throat. I wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her closer to me. She deepens the kiss, and I can feel her urgency.

She reaches down and starts undoing my belt, "James...." She whispers, breaking the kiss. My eyes meet hers, the way my names pours off her tongue is my aphrodisiac, I could listen to it all day. "...I need you" she finishes.

Olivia's POV:

He grabs the back of my neck and pulls me back to his lips. I'm clawing at his jeans, trying to take them down. Once I get him free, he's pulling my panties aside as I'm lining him up with my entrance. I slide down on to him, and I can't help but whimper.

Fuck I've missed him. My hands grip his shoulders as I start to move. His lips don't leave mine. His arms are around my waist, helping me keep my pace. I needed every part of him in this moment. His kiss, his touch, his scent.

He...loves me. This man...told me he loves me. My world crashed, he watched me break into a million pieces, and he still told me he loves me. He just saw me at my absolute worst, and he doesn't want to run away. He wants to be as close to me as he can.

It doesn't take long for both of us to find our release. He puts his head against mine as we both come down.

Bucky: "Liv?"

Olivia: "hm? I mumble, my forehead still resting against his.

Bucky: "promise me something?"

I sit up and look at him, running my hand through his hair. "Anything" I reply.

Bucky: "Don't...disappear on me again....please? Just...talk to me. "

Olivia: "I'm sorry...I was just..."

Bucky: "Scared...I know. Trust me. don't be."

Olivia: "well then....I guess you're stuck with me buddy" I grin.

Bucky: "Shit" he jokes, then kisses my fore head. "Cmon...come shower with me. Then let's go to sleep. You need rest."

He sets up the shower for me, and tells me to get in while he grabs us towels and some clean clothes. When he joins me, he asks to wash my hair for me. I don't know why, but I love when he does that.

Bucky: "hey...tell me what you're thinking?" He asks, when he notices the tears in my eyes again.

Olivia: "James...." I can't help but be overwhelmed. I'm looking at his stupidly beautiful face and I have to get it out. "....I love you too"

He smiles, and throws his head back. "Oh god..." he laughs. He brings his head back up, tears in his eyes, and puts his hands on my face. "Say it again"

Olivia: "I love you"