Beautiful Dreamer

4. I Quit

''A lost student, a fresher at campus just as he is a newbie today. In retrospect, I often wondered to myself if I had any right to feel this much attraction towards someone I'd just met.

From the very beginning, I knew I should have avoided him. It's such a shame that then and now, I haven't changed at all. While he spoke to me, surprisingly, I caught the scent of soap from his body. I remember that day like it was yesterday.

He wore me down to the last cell. Every fibre of my being craved to touch an innocent boy fresh out of high school, and just like before, he smelled of a different kind of soap when he entered my office and thoughts of him in the shower clouded my mind even whilst scolding him.

As I recall, his skin was taut... It must feel hard to the touch. Still, this was not how I remember him. He used to carry himself lightly, as skinny as a twig, but now, I'm sure there must be a thudding sound with every step he takes. Who would have thought the shy boy would sprout up as such? The stuttering, timid voice had gained confidence... The white hat that made him stand out...

Marshmallow head...' Ari chuckled.

'You still continue to take me off guard despite many years passing on, and even while I pretend to be okay, after what Mun had said about you, I find myself remembering the hate I felt towards you when you disappeared.

Because of you, I forced myself to move on, failing to feel the same way with anyone else. You'd secretly torn a part of me and disappeared along with it. I felt dead in every relationship I got into. Perhaps if you hadn't crossed my path that day or even offered to help you find your class, maybe then, I'd have... -What am I thinking right now?

Either way, there shall be no fraternizing with employees. Committing socially intimate acts with staff members is just asking for trouble, especially for someone in my position.'

"I can smell your impure thoughts, Ari." Mun appeared, peeping at the door of his friend's office. "Your cheeks are as red as they can get."

Embarrassed, Ari briefly tilted her chin up and then sighed. It was a relief it hadn't been another person. Her eyes falling back onto her laptop screen, she scoffed bitterly. "Go away. I'm busy."

Mun laughed at his friend's coldness, a side of her character he'd grown accustomed to, then entered the office and shut the door behind him. "If you like him so much, just tell him. You didn't get your chance the first time and messed up the second time too. Call him on a date, then ask him out properly."

"Can we not discuss this here? It's office hours."

"But it seems to be affecting you. If you want, I can transfer him to another department or, better yet, have him fired so you can once more pretend to move on."

"That's unprofessional. Besides, he has done nothing wrong to me."

"You just creep him out, and I don't blame him either. What you did that day, blurting out that you like him by calling him...that, was indeed something. I would hide from you, too, if I were him. As a matter of fact, its the first time I've ever heard you call anyone fondly. Kind of makes me jealous if you ask me."

Closing his laptop, Ari gave up chasing Mun away and looked up at him in the eye. "That day will be the most embarrassing moment of my life. Compared to your Statue of Liberty spectacle, yours is nothing. It's a good thing he is disgusted by me, so that means he won't be telling anyone some tomboy girl hit on him in the most awkward way possible. Though, I wonder. Hasn't he asked you how we knew him?"

"Perfect timing with that question. He asked me earlier today, and I explained the most relevant parts to him. Turns out he transferred schools because someone was stalking him."