My Awesome Wife [COMPLETED]

Chapter 16 - Self realization

Becky didn't go to work, she asked her assistant to take care and call her if any emergency comes, she can't eat properly,  can't sleep properly.
Just missed her wife and daughter. Sometimes, she stay at her daughter room, sometimes looking at their photos for hours.

Grandma is worried about her, she thought she need to talk with her granddaughter.

Becky just sit on the armchairs in her backyard lawn looking up the night sky, its so clear. She think does her parents are up there looking upon her.

She missed her wife and daughter very much. She felt incomplete without them, she scold herself for not listening to her wife before.

Grandma came and sit next to her

"My child, what are you doing out here, its already late"
Becky just give a weak smile at her grandmother
"Did you miss them alot"
"Umm.. yes grandma, I think I never miss someone like this before"
Grandma smile at her
"Umm I can see, and they must have been missed you too."
"Then why she wanted to leave me, if she love me that much"

Grandma looked at her
"Don't ever doubt about her love, I know it. Why she leave, it is because she want to give you time to understand yourself, you are not yourself my child.
If she want to leave you for real, she must asked for divorce, did she asked that"

"Grandma I don't understand, what happened to me, she pledged me alot to leave drinking but I can't control myself "

"That's why, you even can't control your emotions. She tried many time but you didn't listen, I think she is tired and want some peace of mind, and most importantly she want to give little one a happy childhood, now days you two fight alot, its not good for child"

Becky know her fault, grandma continued

"She love you a lot, she never give up on you, when you were in coma, even doctor doesn't believe that you will wake up, but she never give up, she sleep next to your body every single day, crying and talking to you every night. She was alone with your  daughter the whole time but still hold her ground for you"

Becky tears fall silently, grandma know its the time , so she asked
"Do you still love them??"
"What question is that grandma, I do love them with all my heart"
"Then you will bring them"
"Yes I want to"
"But first, you should fixed yourself, you are broken"
"How??"
"Stop drinking, be sober, if you are not,  then this will repeat even they come back, you have to break this circle by abandon alcohol"
"Grandma, alcohol numb my pain"
"What pain?? Is your pain greater than hers,  think about her pain my child, you totally forgot about her, what must she felt, just put yourself in her shoes"

Becky sense uncomfortable
"Grandma, still I can't remember part of my past, where we had lots of memories "

"Did she asked you to remember, did she mad at you for your memory lost"

"No, she said even I can't remember, we can make new memories "
"Then what is your insecurity here, what is your problem here"
"Grandma, I felt guilty for not remembering"
"Why my child why?, Its not your fault neither hers"
"Grandma --"

"Listen, my child, whatever you are doing now is more painful than your lost memories, memories is just past story. Why you dwelling in the past when you have your present and future in front of you."

Grandma looked at her and continued
"And for your information, she never think like that, when you wake up, even you can't remember her, she is very thankful. She was very happy to see you alive"

"What should I do grandma"
"First thing tomorrow, go meet a therapist and try to fix yourself, you have to gain her trust again, I somehow heard that you are enjoying with random girls"