Turning Tides

24. Birthdays Across the Universe

Dad put a greasy pizza box on the kitchen table. It was bigger than our table for two, so there was no room for plates or cups. There was a 1 and 8 candle flickering in the middle of the sausage chunks and pepperonis. I hoped the grease wouldn't ignite into a fireball.

"It feels like time started moving in double speed as soon as you turned fourteen. Please stop growing up so fast!"

"Can you hurry with your speech? I don't want to be eating a Wax Lover's pizza."

"Well, you know you have to make a wish."

I closed my eyes and blew the candles out with a slow exhale. I heard dad's camera on his phone go off, no doubt to add to his incredibly embarrassing collection of Instagram posts of me.

Dad asked, "What did you wish for?" He asked every year because younger me couldn't hold secrets and would beg him to ask.

Now, I was less inclined to tell him because instead of wishing to become a dinosaur, I was wishing to stop reliving the sight of Jayden pitching a tent in the blanket and the feeling of him removing my pants. "I can't tell you. It won't come true if I do."

"Oh. Okay. I suppose you're right," maybe it's because he was going to treat me like an adult now, but Dad uncharacteristically relented. We ate the greasy pizza while watching TV, and dad brought out a small box wrapped in paper that was wrapped in familiar red balloon wrapping paper.

"Are you ever going to get new wrapping paper once you run out of mom's?"

"Oh, just open it," he aimed his phone at me which caused a pit in my stomach to form because I was going to have to embellish my reaction.

I ripped the paper off and opened the small white box. There was a fifty-dollar bill on top of two pieces of paper. The papers read:

BOARDING PASS

From: SOUTH CAROLINA To: NEVADA

Seats L4-L5

My stomach tingled, and I couldn't hold back the smile that filled my face. 

Dad's phone clicked a few times. "Those are for us to take a trip back home during your Spring Break," he told me.

"Oh my God! Thank you so much. I can't wait to rejoin civilization."

He smiled and nodded, obviously pleased with himself. I had to give him credit.

We watched some cheesy 80s action movie that dad adored. Once it ended, he told me that he would be taking the car to go into The Mainland to pickup some materials for finishing putting his room together. With my birthday celebration concluded and my body falling into a grease-induced coma, I went to my room and laid in bed. As soon as I opened Instagram, I was shown that Jayden had posted. Fuck you, Instagram. It was a picture of everyone from the senior and junior class in the banquet room of his house.

It was captioned in all of his patented poorly written glory: "i would by a lottery ticket now that im legal but it looks like i already won it if these are my friends"

My eyes couldn't have rolled harder. Then, I saw that Drew was standing with his arm around Jayden's neck. My eyes were doing summersaults in my head.

Just under Jayden's post, was my dad's post of me eating my birthday pizza alone in our half-kitchen. A far cry from the Kingsley's banquet room. A couple of family members and dad's friends commented, but it paled in comparison to the interaction on Jayden's post. So much for his idea of sharing our birthdays.

The thought of happy birthday-texting my way back into his life crossed my mind, but I was paralyzed by the possibility that doing so would prompt him to make a grand speech in that banquet room telling the entire school about Ellison the Underwear Thief just for some credit with his "bro" Drew. In a pathetic act, I tossed my phone to the foot of the bed and rolled onto my side. I drifted off with the sun still shinning, only to be resuscitated to a sunless wold by Tate calling.

She screamed, "Happy fucking birthday! You can finally start your porn career. I love that I've gotten to meet you, and I already know it's been the best day ever, and I hope you remember me when you're famous on BottomTwinks.com."

I yanked my head away from the phone and smashed the volume down button. "Thanks! I can't wait to work such a respectable job. My dad will be thrilled. Wait, are you not at Jayden's party?"

"I wouldn't go without you," she said, "I asked him if you were coming, and he said you canceled because you had plans with your dad for your own birthday. I want to take you out tonight to celebrate."

Well, at least that meant Jayden had kept my thievery a secret. "Aw how kind of you, bestie. Where do you wanna go?"

"You're legal now, and you definitely need a man, so we are going to Bottoms Up. It's an eighteen-plus gay club in Charleston."

"Wow, you think I'm a casual hookup kind of guy? Also, are gay clubs allowed to exist in this state?"

I heard Tate's turn signal ticking. "I see the way you look at Jayden. You are absolutely feral. You need someone to get him out of your head."

Given that a breeze hitting the right spot could turn me on over the past few days, I agreed saying, "Fine, but I am not obsessed with him. How are you going to get in, Ms. Underage?"

"I'm 21 and from Georgia according to my ID. I'll pick you up at 7:00 because it's a bit of a drive."

After we hung-up, I dug to the bottom of my sock and underwear drawer for my box of... materials to prepare for the kind of night that was ahead of me. Jayden was going to get fucked out of my stupid little brain.