Beyond the dreamgate | A Caspian love story

Chapter 11

We were finally back on the ship with a sword and a new crew member. Everyone was fast asleep, but I just couldn't. All I could think about is what would've happened if Caspian wasn't there at right time. I couldn't beat up that guy. Though I was going to try though.

My life would be completely different. Would Aslan helped me if that had happened. Probably not, he is busy with other things.

Lucy was fast asleep so I got up and put on a long coat and got out on deck. I saw Drinain standing and keeping his eyes open and looking out on the horizon.

"Hello." I greeted him softly.

"Hello dear." He spoke back to me. "Something on your mind?"

I was shocked he could see that something was wrong with me. But I know I show a lot of emotions, my parents just didn't care to ask me anything about them.

I gave the captain a slight smile. "A lot."

"I am a fine listener ma'am."

I started thinking about everything that had happened to me before Narnia and now that I am here.

"It is just kind of weird." I took a seat on the railing pulling the coat closer to me. "I always dreamed of going somewhere that was so far away from my home and my family. It is just..."

I gave in a sign.

"You don't like it?" He asked with raised eyebrows.

"No no no." I gave in a slight chuckle. "I love it here, I just, I don't want to wake up a realise it was all a dream. Somehow it feels like a dream. How am I just that one person out of a billion people who gets to go here. Why am I even here?" The last part I said in a soft voice, but Drinain heard every single thing.

"I have seen you walking around deck, helping everyone who struggles even a little bit." He took a seat next to me. I looked at the wheel, hoping it was fine that he left his station for a little bit. "I see a young strong woman, someone who loves to help everyone. Someone who is loved by many. Even more by some. A woman who uses sarcasm with everything and put a smile on everyones face when needed. Protects the unprotected, yes I am talking about Eustace. That is someone I see and many others agree with me. That is a small part of who you are, begin with accepting that and then move forward to the next thing. Just know, we are very happy that you came aboard with us."

He stood up once again and got behind the wheel, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I have never spoken to Drinian, but he was a wise man. He kind off looked like my grandfather who I had lost a few years ago. He knew me better then anyone. He cared about me more then the others.

After a while me and Drinian started talking but in a less serious manner. Making jokes and telling stories about our life. I obviously had to change some stories so he wouldn't catch on that I was from a whole different time line then Lucy and Edmund.

We talked for so long that I felt my eyes getting heavier and heavier. I heard a door open and close, but I was already drifting off to dream land. To tired to even look up and see who was getting on deck.

I felt two arms lifting me up and bringing me down the stairs. I couldn't open my eyes, my energy was long gone.

I heard a door creak open that instantly followed by.

"Shit." I heard a low voice. I couldn't make out who it was and left it at that. "For a small girl you do take up the whole bed Lucy."

I heard everything, but nothing really stayed in my head. The door creaked open again and we went down another flight of stairs. I was in and out of it till I felt a soft pillow and a blanket and I was out in a light.

I opened my eyes and I was looking at a wooden ceiling I was not used to. I shot up in my bed but I almost felt out of it. I then noticed I was laying in a hammock. 

I got out of it and stumbled on my feet. I looked around the room but there was no one in sight. I tightened the coat around me and walked up the stairs to the deck. Without anyone noticing me I took a run for Lucy and my room.

Lucy sat reading on the bed and looked up when she saw me.

"Where were you." She stood up and took a step to me. She was trying to come off as a mother who was putting her kid in place but I saw her lips twitch up a little bit. "A little birdie told me that you slept with no other then the King."

I gasped at that, I would never do that. Well, not when people sleep a few feet away from me.

"All I know is that I was talking to Drinian and I must have fallen asleep, but I did not sleep with Caspian." My cheeks flushed at the image that went through my head.

"I know." She gave me a knowing smile. "I heard from Edmund that Caspian placed you in his hammock once he saw you fast asleep next to Drinian. He couldn't put you back in ours, because I might have used the whole bed once you were gone."

I nodded at understanding and after a quick bye I walked back to the deck. I looked around the ship seeing everyone working hard. They really need a break if I am being honest. It is always work, sleep work, it never changes.

I saw Caspian standing next to Drinian having some small talk as it seems. His eyes moved down and locked with mine. He gave me a warm smile and went back to talking to Drinian.

I saw Edmund working on the Lord's sword and decided to talk to him. I know Lucy very good because we talk every night and to be honest I don't want to annoy Caspian.

"Hey Edmund." He averted his eyes from the sword. He was already half way done.

"Hey Lilith." I saw he was debating on asking me something. "Why did your parents name you Lilith? Isn't it associated with the devil?" His cheeks flushed at his own question.

I laughed at his straight forward question. I took a seat next to him on one of the barrels. "Yes it is associated with the Devil. She is the mother of Demons and was the first wife of Adam. She is also known as the spirit of the Night. There is a reason why they named me that, but I don't want to do a whole trauma dump on you." I chuckled to lighten op the mood.

"It is okay." Edmund spoke. "I like to hear about it, you seem close to Lucy and Caspian likes you too. It is just fair that I also get to know you."

"My uhm parents, they don't like me. They ignore me all the time. I don't even think they know that I have a job or certain hobbies. They just see me as a roommate that sometimes eat their food, not their daughter who is seeking for some type of love. I honestly think that it was a mistake that I was born. A big mistake. They didn't want me so they hurt me where they could hurt me. They named me the mother of demons. I don't mind it very much, it is still a pretty name."

"It is a pretty name." I looked up and saw Caspian sitting a few barrels away. How did I not notice him approaching?

"Thanks." I ran my hand through my hair and moved some pieces out of my eyes.

"It is a very pretty name indeed." Edmund mocked Caspian and gave him a slight smirk. I sat a little bit uncomfortable between the two guys who were clearly having an internal conversation with each other.

"I don't think you are a mistake, Lilith." Edmund started. He put the sword away and sat up serious. "If you were a mistake then you wouldn't be here. Lilith you matter to so many people. Don't think so low of you."

"Remember Lilith." I heard Caspian say from beside me. I felt a warm sensation on my right hand and saw he was holding it. I moved my eyes over the places he traced with his thump. "There are a lot of mistakes in this world, but you are not one of them."