Midnight Moon (2)

Chapter 20 - Panic

"...Mr Clearwater!" yelled Principle Weber.

I jumped in my seat flinching as I remembered where I was.

"S-sorry, Sir. What were you saying?" I asked. Principle Weber scrutinised me dubiously before sitting slowly back down into his chair.

"I'm worried about you, Seth." he said taking off his glasses to wipe them. "All of us are. Your teachers, your mother, your classmates and friends. You used to be a good student, suddenly your grades drop, you drop all of your extracurriculars, you distance yourself from everyone and now you're skipping school! What's going on?"

"I, um." I clenched and unclenched my fists, unsure of what to say. The silence enveloped us. I didn't look up, waiting for Weber to say something. He let several minutes tick past before speaking.

"I'm assigning you to the school counsellor and informing your parents." he said finally, "Seth, you have no choice but to repeat the school year. If I hear that you are not attending the counsellor sessions, I will push you down to the year below."

"Are you serious?" I asked, paling at the thought

"I've never been more serious, Seth." said Principle Weber, "Remember, this is for your own good."

I left his office feeling weak. My legs felt as though they could not support my body weight, and I stumbled down the hall. I hadn't phased in weeks and my body was starting to feel the absence of it. Maybe my wolf form was getting weaker.

It was harder to receive messages from Jacob and Leah. I wasn't sure if they were cutting me off or if I really was losing my connection with my wolf form. The events with Tristan were still shaking me. I couldn't concentrate on school. I couldn't even pull my attention to the fast growing relationship of Charlie and mom.

The hours melted into days and the days into weeks. Sleep passed in blinks and meals in gulps. The flowers had grown wildly and now were beginning to wither, preparing themselves for the smog of summer.

"Seth?"

I turned towards the voice, suddenly aware that I was leaning against the row of lockers that bordered the school hallways.

"Amy. Hi." I said. Her hair had grown out a little longer and she approached me cautiously. She lifted her hand up and touched my forehead with the back of her hand.

"You feel..."

"Warm?" I asked, used to the comments of my feverishly hot skin

"No. Cold." she said, "Too cold."

It took me a while to process that she was right. I was shivering. When did wolves ever shiver? my blood was supposed to keep me warm. It was why I didn't need to wear extra layers on those cold nights guarding Bella or the Cullens.

"Here, take my coat." She threw the jacket over my shoulders and buttoned down the front. I was suddenly very aware of how close we were. I watched her fingers deftly slip the buttons in place, bending my head down so that I was almost resting on her shoulder.

"Seth?" Amy asked, she tugged my arm. "Come on, let's get you to the nurse."

"Amy." I said. She looked at me, "I'm scared." I said softly.

I never thought that the words I said out loud could have such a profound impact on me. The way they curled out in trembles from my mouth, sending reverbrations through my body so that my shoulders sagged and the tears that had threatened to leak out all year finally spilt.

I didn't think feeling would be stronger when in front of someone who would pull me in, wrap their fingers into my hair and hug me tightly whilst I lost control. They would not speak. I didn't think it would be so awkward and so peaceful at the same time.

I was aware someone could see us. But that moment with my face buried in her shoulder, inhaling the smell of fresh duvets and soap, I wanted to keep forever. I wanted to drown in it. 

Drown in that safety, that comfort, that promise that everything would be alright.