Daylight

Chapter Thirty-Three

Ava slept soundly that night, but unfortunately as the trial neared, her nightmares began to resurface. Her sleep grew fitful, short and frustrated. It showed on her physically and emotionally. She even agreed to see a doctor, who prescribed her some medication, but it didn't seem to help. Still, she took it.

The trial was only days away now, and there she was awake in the middle of the night sitting out on the balcony. She'd gone to bed with Sebastian but had once again been awoken by a choking feeling, Javier's hand around her throat. Curled with her knees to her chest, she breathed deeply through the now familiar panic that coursed through her body. She didn't wake Sebastian for them anymore, she handled them quietly alone if she could. She'd been going to therapy, and she was trying to use some of the grounding techniques she'd been taught.

Meanwhile when Sebastian woke up and saw the clock read three in the morning with the other side of the bed cold, he quietly rose. He checked on Rosa then Luca before he went into the kitchen and made chamomile tea for Ava.

She heard the bedroom door open and knew Sebastian was up. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, reminding herself once again that she wasn't being choked as she smoothed her hand up and down her neck. "It's not real..." she murmured to herself in reminder as she heard footsteps coming towards the balcony.

"Did I wake you?" she asked quietly.

"No," he replied softly. "I woke up on my own and realized you were gone." Seb sat the teacup down beside her.

"Thank you," she said, reaching for the cup of tea. Her fingers were cold; it was a chilly night. "I don't know how long I've been up, but it feels like a while."

Sebastian sat down beside her, giving her space. "You're welcome, honey."

She took a sip of the hot tea and held the mug close to her chest. "It was the choking one again," she shared of her nightmare. "I swear, it feels like I can't breathe for so long after I wake up..."

"I'm sorry," he whispered. Sebastian never knew quite what to say when she had the worst nightmares. "I wish I knew how to help."

She exhaled a slow, albeit shaky breath before she took another sip of tea. "After the trial... I'm hoping it will get better again," she told him. "But I don't expect much sleep between now and then."

"How about... after the trial, we go on vacation?" He suggested. "Anywhere you have dreamed of going, and I will take you. All of us."

After the trial... why was it so hard to picture anything after the trial? It seemed too big and daunting, and she just had to make it through. Maybe something waiting on the other side wouldn't hurt. "I'll think on it... I'm still learning that I can dream," she told him, managing a small smile for him.

"I know. It's just a suggestion," he replied softly. "Something you can look forward to."

Ava nodded slowly, gently exhaling another shaky breath. "I think maybe I need that," she admitted. "It's... so hard to see past the trial. I want so badly to look him in the face and show everyone he's a liar, but I am so afraid I can't. Not like this."

"You can," he assured. "You're the strongest woman I have ever met. I know you can do this."

Everyone told her that. Sebastian, his mother, her therapist, friends, everyone. It just felt so hard to believe. "I don't want to let everyone down..." she admitted in a breathy exhale.

Sebastian moved to crouch in front of his wife and cupped her face in his hands, wiping her tears. "You have enough evidence to put this man away for a very long time, Avana. If I could, I would punch him so hard it would send him six feet under, but that's apparently frowned upon." He grinned as she smiled slightly. "We've got this. Together."