Tacoma Falls: Home and Heart

The truth, and nothing but the truth

Shepherd

Maury and I tugged on our pants before heading downstairs to the kitchen. He brewed us two coffees, brought a pie to the table, and served two slices on plates. When Maury and I discussed something serious, we had pie and coffee. Both would bring us comfort, so it eased the tense conversation.

"Anytime you're ready, Shep," Maury coaxed.

I chewed and swallowed my food before diving into the abyss of my family. Then, I started my diatribe about my family. "From the time we could walk, my pa took us around the cattle. He would show us how to clean the barn, feed the cattle, and fix things. But he also would drill into our heads his backwoods thinking."

Flashback - Shepherd, age 10

Waylon, Beau, and I were mucking stalls. Pa told us he wanted the barn cleaned.

"Boys," Pa said, entering the barn.

"Hey, Pa," we said.

"You're not making much progress." Pa stood behind us with his arms crossed.

"Sorry, Pa. We'll work harder," Waylon said.

"That thinking won't cut it, Waylon. I won't raise lazy boys. You need to run a tight ship at a ranch, or your ranch will fail like Gene Gilroy's ranch. He only got blue ribbons because he bribes the judges and feeds his cattle enhancements."

Confusion swept me because Mr. Gilroy fed his cows grass.

Pa zeroed in on Beau. "I heard you have been hanging around that Fuller boy. Is that true?"

Beau's eyes widened. "No, sir."

"Don't lie to me, boy."

"I swear I haven't been palling around with anyone other than Way and Shep."

"I know you're lying. You can work late until you can tell the truth."

"Yes, sir."

"Boys, I won't raise sinners. The town is waiting for you to make mistakes. I've seen those sinners that carouse and do ungodly things. I won't have that for my boys. No one will disrespect our family. You hear me?"

"Yes, Pa," we said.

"Now finish your work or no supper. Beauregard, after supper, your chucking cow pies."

"Yes, sir," Beau said.

"And I don't want to hear you shorten your names again." Pa strode from the barn as we released a breath.

End of flashback

Maury knitted his brows in concern. "Did your pa ever hit you?"

"Pa found other ways to punish us. He kept us busy on the ranch, so we didn't have time to socialize with anyone. He expected us to court a girl at thirteen but also had to approve of the girl. We kept mouths shut and worked on the ranch."

"I don't understand your pa's logic." Maury shook his head.

"No one did. But it was our way of life." I shrugged.

"That's no way of life. Working your children early morning and late evening. Preaching the word of the Bible to keep them in line. Not accepting them for who they are. It's abuse, Shep. Plain and simple."

I stared at Maury and blinked. I never considered Pa's raising as abuse. He didn't slap us around, but instilling fear was just as bad, if not worse.

"You don't have children to use them as workhorses. Sure, we work on the farm because all families contribute. But not to the point you hate the idea. I just knew farm life wasn't for me. I looked up to Papa Larry because he helped people."