I remember being brought to the police station immediately after. They wouldn't tell me anything. I begged to know what was happening and if my family were still alive. After all, all I needed was hope. Hope. The only thing stronger than fear.
I was brought to a children's care home near the beach. I was given my own room 'for the time being' they told me. A female social worker, Sally, was the only one to come up to my room. She attempted to comfort me, but I was having none of it. I was way past the stage of ever being consoled. Sally offered me a drink and a chocolate biscuit, which I turned away and through muffled sobs, I said something about being tired and for her to leave me alone. Sally made eye contact with me, with her big blue eyes. She actually really did care about and pity me. I could tell. She told me to promise not to do anything stupid tonight. I knew exactly what she meant, and she looked really serious so I nodded my head and she left.
I threw myself down on my pillow and sobbed endlessly, until I literally couldn't cry anymore, I just felt as if I had 'ran out' of tears. I just lay on my lumpy bed, staring up at the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. I couldn't really describe how I felt, it was as if someone had taken all my feelings away. I just felt numb and empty.
Thats when I began to turn to music. Every single night I would listen to a song called "Fix You" by Coldplay. Every single time, I would break down into tears, especially on the line 'when you lose something you can't replace.' The music would distract me, but when the end of the song came, i'd return to bitter reality.
Time passed. I don't how long. It could have been two days or two weeks or even two years, but every day felt the same. I would gaze wistfully out the smeary window. Actually, I don't if the window was dirty, or my vision was just blurred, with all the tears streaming down my face. Social workers would pass me. I saw their refection in the window. The would stop, shake their heads symathetically and continue. The highlight of my day would be when Sally was on her shift. She would be the only one who'd actually try and talk to me. We became close, and have a chat regularly. She'd ask me questions about my hobbies, what music I liked, sports and my favourite television programme. She kept me sane. Then one day she asked me if I wanted to go back to school. I immediately shouted "NO" and ran off to my room. I had to tell her why, or she would send me back. I knew that for a fact..
YOU ARE READING
Begin Again
Teen Fiction''...Falling... And then I would wake up, shaking and sweating. That's usually how it goes." After losing her family, Leah finds it really difficult to cope. Wherever she goes, her past seems to follow her. This is her story, as she tries to begin...
