A Homestuck Thanksgiving (Oneshot)

Happy Thanksgiving

Today was Thanksgiving. That meant time for John to host a gigantic family/friend/everybody gathering! Nothing could go wrong, and everyone was already starting to arrive. Rose and Kanaya were already there to help set up, Dave and Karkat were the next to get there, Vriska and Terezi next, until everyone was basically piling through the door all at once at the exact time they were supposed to be there. Everything was going to go just as planned! Because John was in charge of cooking the turkey, and Kanaya and Rose helped cook everything else.

"Okay, everyone! Welcome to the first ever... uh... Thanksgiving with all of us here! Yeah, our first Thanksgiving together! Sorry for not having an entire script for this," John greeted everyone. Wait, where was Vriska? Oh, there she is. How nice. I wonder where she was... Gog I love foreshadowing.

"Are you guys ready to have the best Thanksgiving ever? What's the best is that people who actually know how to cook cooked the food!!" John announced, and everyone cheered.

"x33< i can't wait!!! espawcially fur the turkey!!!" Nepeta licked her lips.

"I already love this! And I )(aven't even eaten anyt)(ing yet!" Feferi bounced in excitement and turned to Aradia.

"me t00!" Aradia smiled.

Meanwhile, the always angry Karkat was trying not to mentally and emotionally die. "WHY THE FUCK DID EGDERP HAVE TO INVITE EVERYONE?"

"Because he... I guess he wanted nobody to miss out? Who knows?" Dave answered, giving Karkat pats on the head. Karkat just growled quietly in response.

And with that, John disappeared into the kitchen. And then some, no, basically a full on fucking explosion of smoke came from the kitchen.

"W)(AT WAS T)(AT?? IS T)(--E )(OUS--E BURNING??" Feferi was about to panic. Hell, everyone was about to panic. Except for Dave, Karkat, Sollux, Vriska, maybe Eridan, and Gamzee.

"Nobody Has To Worry! It Was Not Anything Serious, Just, The Turkey Was Burnt. Like, Severely Burnt," Kanaya reassured everyone but the chaos continued with Nepeta.

"xOO< no TURKEY??? TURKEY IS EFURRYTHING ON THANKSGIVING!!!" She cried, dramatically falling into Jade's arms.

Everyone immediately started yelling again. Basically chaos? That's describing what the fuck's even happening in one word. Chaos. Such a funny word.

Karkat stormed over to the kitchen through all of the other people. Dave followed him. "Kit-kat, calm down-"

"OKAY, YOU WERE IN CHARGE OF COOKING THE FUCKING TURKEY, EGGDERP. WHAT IN THE WIDE WIDE WORLD OF FUCKING DOG SHIT IS THIS? HOW DID YOU POSSIBLY FUCK IT UP THIS BAD?" Karkat hissed at John.

"It wasn't me who fucked it up, I swear!" John raised his hands in a 'don't hit me' motion. Karkat growled at him.

"THEN WHO WAS IT?"

"I don't know, but-"

"NO. IT WAS YOU, END OF STORY. AT LEAST I BARELY EVEN LIKE TURKEY IN THE FIRST PLACE."

"No, Karkat, it actually wasn't me, I'm not lying. I set the temperature to 375 to cook it and when I came in here to get the turkey out of the oven, it was 550! So it's not my fault!" John basically pleaded.

"It's time for one of the things I do best," Rose said mysteriously from the corner. "It's interrogation time."

"ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO INTERROGATE EVERYONE ONE BY ONE? THAT'S GOING TO TAKE A REALLY LONG TIME. JUST END THE FUCKING PARTY. DONE. SHIT'S ALREADY BAD ENOUGH AS IT-" Karkat was cut off by Dave's hand over his mouth.