Little Sprout 🌱 A SandLongtae Story.

Chapter 1: Running Away or Going Home

4 years Later

SAND

If I wasn't a little too old to start over in college and a little too poor, I would have opted to become a doctor. Since my options were pretty limited, I trained to be an Emergency Medical Technician for six months, started working afterwards as an ambulance staff while I continued to earn my Paramedic certification. I was working in the hospital and saving lives had become the new purpose of my life. I consider it my self imposed penance for the wrong I had done to Ray and my self redemption. Even when I couldn't save Ray, I could at least save a lot of other lives.

Every now and then, I'd still hang out with the rest of the group, mostly just Boston and Nick, now that they've moved in together. They've all been so sympathetic and perhaps, the shared grief of losing someone we all loved had made us develop a bond, so on occasions I'd still see Cheum, Mew and now I had even made peace with Top.

A year ago, I started going out again and the first time I kissed someone else, I sobbed for hours in Nick's arms with Boston sadly looking on, as I confessed I still couldn't forget the way Ray's lips tasted and someone else's just wasn't the same. The first time I successfully slept with someone else, I was closer to drunk than sober, feeling like I cheated on Ray that I couldn't bear a repeat performance in the next few months. Top had recommended I seek professional help and I just scoffed at that because how do I afford that with my meager salary as an EMT.

When my mother passed away more than a year ago, I was once again plunged into grief but to my utter surprise, I was left with hefty insurance money she had worked hard to pay off during her lifetime, making sure her only son could live a better life once she passed away. Suddenly, I was financially capable and a lot of possibilities had opened for me. Still I couldn't shake off the loneliness and emptiness I felt and I didn't have any desire to spend the money. So I kept half of it in the bank and invested the other through Top's guidance.

On one of the rare nights I allowed myself to go out, that's when I met Tian again in P'Yos bar. Tian was a schoolmate in the university and a common friend of Ray and I. Tian also came from high society, spoiled and wild like Ray. We used to bump into each other at parties. He suddenly vanished a few years back and he was saddened when he found out that Ray had passed away.

He talked about living in a small village in a remote mountainous area called Pha Pun Dao where he works as a Volunteer Teacher. He shared how much it changed his life and had mused loudly, if only Ray had gotten the same chance, maybe Ray would still be alive and healthy.

The changes in Tian are outstanding and he insists that the simpler life, away from everything, had made him happier. He was never going back to live permanently in the city. He just comes for short visits to family and this time he came back to attend the wedding of his best friend. The reason he was in the bar is the stag party being thrown in honor of said best friend's last night as a single man.

I was very intrigued about the charm of the village as Tian had described it. Finding out that I was now working as a paramedic, he said If I was interested, the village is in dire need of medical volunteers. There was a village doctor but no one else who could provide additional medical assistance and it would be great if additional volunteers would come.

I told him I'd think about it and he gave me his contact number, saying he would be going back in a week's time and if I was interested, we could go back together.

LONGTAE

After I graduated from the university, I had wanted to come home. My father had asked what I was gonna do and I said I didn't know. I always assumed I'd go back home and help everyone just like my father, as the chief of the village.

Instead, my father told me I was too young and encouraged me to take this chance to live my life for myself before I give myself to the service of the people. He wanted me to have fun, be young and free. Only my father should have known that fun for me is walking through the endless tea fields early morning- listening to the birds chirping as the field workers starts their work for the day, it is swimming in the waterfall at noontime- when the sun is highest in the sky and the heat is almost unbearable and most especially, it is looking over the Pha Pun Dao cliff at nighttime-practicing counting 1000 stars so that someday, when I find my one true love, we can visit and count stars together.

Still, trusting my father's wisdom, I stayed in Bangkok and found a job as an assistant photographer at a studio specializing in weddings and other special occasions. One of its perks was free travels, we go wherever the clients wanted to do the photo session. On the side, I continued to take photos of everything I found interesting and posted it on my website and social media accounts, which had already amassed quite a number of followers and subscribers.

It was fun, I've made a lot of friends since and I've visited a lot of wonderful places but in my heart nothing will ever beat the beauty of my little Pha Pun Dao Village and I miss it everyday.

In my second year of work, I met a handsome man. P'Ton was 5 years older than me and he was a talented Photographer. We connected through our shared passion for taking photos and eventually I found myself falling in love. It made me miss Tian more and I finally understood what it must be like for him, falling in love with Chief Phupha.

It was wonderful for a while and I decided to continue staying in Bangkok, not wanting to leave P'Ton behind. Eventually, he'd come home later and later and he'd call me a prude every time I told him not to be too cozy with other men- he told me they were only his friends. Our lifestyle was just so different. I absolutely detested the crowded clubs he preferred to hang out in and I ended up opting to stay at home and just let him go out to have fun on his own. He was scary when angry and if he didn't get his way, so I had meekly stayed by side and avoided making him mad, still believing that my love was enough to keep the relationship alive.

On our third anniversary, which I assumed he had forgotten since he left the apartment we shared without even a greeting. I decided to surprise him. I'd go hang out with him and his friends in the club he liked so much and  thinking this would make him happy and maybe things can get better for us.

What I found instead was my boyfriend, in the side alley of the club, his hand down some other guys pants, making out. I left without letting him know I was ever there, packed my bags, left the apartment we shared and went to stay with a friend until I could sort out my situation.

As I was nursing my broken heart, I had wondered if this was one of the lessons my father wanted me to learn. City boys are not compatible with simple, small town boys like me.