Undesirables, Unmentionables, & Underachievers

3: This Story Was Inspired by an Episode of Friends

*Mikey's POV*
"You mean to tell me that this barista was in a film with you as a naughty librarian?" Frank asked, unconvinced, glancing at the brunette working the cappuccino machine behind the counter.

Trying to maintain a serious face, I added, "I swear, those glasses are some I'll never forget! Go ask her if you can check out a book and see what she says. She won't deny it, if it's her. I think her name was Maria."

"One, her name is Stacey; it says so on her name tag. Two, no. If you really think it's her, go ask her if you can check out a book from her private library," Frank wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and I tried not to laugh.

"Hey a lot of people use fake names in porn," I pointed out.

Before Frank could argue, my phone buzzed and I pulled it out.

It was a number I recognized, but didn't have labeled in my phone for obvious reasons.

"Uh, Gerard, are you gonna answer that?" Frank asked, curiously, watching me stare at my ringing phone.

"Uh, no. Probably shouldn't," I mumbled, moving to put the phone back in my pocket. Frank leaned across the table and quickly grabbed it from me.

"Ooo... an unknown number," Frank said, answering the phone, and using a ridiculous accent that sort of made me question why he wasn't wearing a fucking monocle, he said, "Hello? May I ask who is calling on this fine day?"

I quickly snatched the phone back from Frank, who gave me a what-the-fuck-did-you-do-that-for look, but I ignored it.
Hey," I said, sighing.

"Porn?! Porn, Mikey, really?! What the hell is wrong with you?" He was yelling and I feared Frank may have heard him. I looked up and saw a confused expression on Frank's (adorable) face. Praying he hadn't heard Gerard's outburst, I excused myself to outside, where I stood for the remainder of the "conversation".

"Calm down. It's fine. I'm making good money and I'm happy. How're mum and dad?" I asked, nervously.

"PRETTY GOOD CONSIDERING THEY DON'T KNOW THEIR SON IS A PORNSTAR!" I had to pull the phone away from my ear as not to go deaf.

"Look, Gee-" he cut me off with more yelling.

"ACTUALLY, THEY'RE DOING FANTASTIC 'CAUSE THERE IS NO ONE USING EITHER OF THEIR NAMES TO STAR IN PORN."

I smiled apologetically to a young girl accompanied by her mother as they walked inside the Starbucks, both giving me strange looks, clearly appalled by the content of the phone call they were hearing.

"Gerard, calm down," I said, in what I hoped was a soothing voice.

"Calm down? Calm down?!" Gerard's voice was rapidly rising, yet again, and I set the phone down on the ledge of the window, pulling a cigarette out of a pack in the inner pocket of my leather jacket. I dove my fingers into the pocket of my ridiculously tight jeans and produced a red lighter.

I let Gerard yell for a while as I lit my cigarette, ignoring the 'No Smoking' signs on the side of the building.

When I could no longer hear Gerard's rage-filled shouts coming from my phone, I picked it up. I could hear Gerard breathing heavily on the other end. It almost sounded like he was sobbing.

"Jesus Christ... Gerard? It's fine. Everything is okay," I said, calmly, after rolling my eyes at his ridiculous reaction.

"Where are you?" He asked, urgently.

"Uh, Starbucks," I replied, rolling my eyes again as I took a long drag.

"I mean where, though, Michael. I'm tired of your shit," Gerard said, harshly, clearly fed up.

I took a long exhale before responding. "Nevada."

"Where in Nevada, Mikey?" He asked. I tried not to crack a smile, knowing I was riding on his last nerve.

"Outside Starbucks," I replied, simply, inhaling deeply, feeling alive with the familiar buzz of a slow death rolled up in paper.

"You're a fucking ass hat," Gerard sighed, angrily.

"Thank-" He hung up before I finished expressing my gratitude. "You..." I finished, awkwardly sliding my phone into my back pocket. I dropped the cigarette on the ground and stepped on it, twisting my foot before kicking it into the wood chips around the bushes lining the building.

Checking my reflection in the door and fixing my hair, I made my way inside, sitting back down across from Frank in the booth.

"Who was that?" Frank asked, furrowed brow.

"Just my old roommate. Thinks I owe him money. He's the one who broke the tv though, not me," I let out a chuckle, to top off the lie- except it wasn't a complete lie. Gerard and I did used to be roommates way back when. And he did break the tv one time and claimed I should pay for it because I "pushed him" into the tv or something. It's not my fault he's clumsy.

"Oh, wow. What an asshole," Frank said, giving a quick smile before downing the rest of his drink.

---
After leaving Starbucks, we started walking aimlessly down the street.

"So where do you live?" I asked, taking a sip from my not-so-hot hot chocolate (and silently cursing Gerard for wasting my time and letting my hot chocolate get cold).

"Uh, just a few blocks from the studio," Frank said, hand brushing against mine as he pointed ahead. "Carson Street."

"Oh, I live next door." I quickly added, "to the studio. Not to you. I'm not even sure exactly where Carson Street is to be honest with you." I gave a modest shrug.

"Oh, wow. Do you film a lot?" Frank asked, biting his lip, nervously as we walked.

"Eh, kinda. I mean, you don't do straight porn so you probably don't have as many opportunities as I do. But it's seriously annoying that the girls never want to work with me. Like what the hell. Just cause I'm in gay porn sometimes doesn't mean I'm disease ridden. We get tested, too!" I shook my head, slightly embarrassed by my little outburst.

Thankfully, Frank just chuckled. "Sounds rough.... But seriously, I get a lot of opportunities for stuff too. I don't do straight porn- normally. But there's big bucks in doing kinky shit. Plus, I've got tattoos and some people love that," Frank pointed out, rolling up his sleeves.

"Touché," I said, laughing. "Hey we've gotta film more tomorrow anyway, do you wanna just stay at my place tonight? Since I live closer and all," I offered, hoping he'd say yes.

"Oh, uh.... I dunno," Frank said, averting his eyes.

"I don't bite, Frank," I said, giving a half-hearted chuckle.

There was a brief moment of silence as Frank thought it over and I tried my best not to look like I cared too much.

"Alright," he agreed. "But you should know," he leaned up and whispered in my ear. "I can't make the same promise, Gerard." I felt a shiver run throughout my body.

Jesus fucking Christ this kid was hot.

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Legit inspired by Friends. Anyone know why? 🌚