Undesirables, Unmentionables, & Underachievers

4:My Life: A Cheesy Sitcom About Helpful Strippers and Evil Pornstars

*Gerard's POV*
"He did what?" Patrick asked me, incredulously.

"I'm going to kill Mikey," I groaned in frustration.

"Do you even know where he is?" Patrick asked, brow furrowed in worry.

"No," I sighed, glumly and stuck my face into my pillow, trying to suffocate myself.

I felt the bed shift as he sat down on it. "You've gotta find him and stop him," he said, seriously. I looked up to see him pulling his bottom lip into his mouth with his teeth.

"How?" I groaned, feeling hopeless.

"I don't know... But you've gotta do it. This could ruin you. Picture it: you apply for a job and they go through the applications, look you up, BAM," he smacked his hands together startling me. "Porn comes up and they immediately put your application into the reject pile, unaware that it wasn't even you they had just seen."

"Uhngggg," I groaned/mumbled, plopping my face back into my pillow.

After a moment of agonizing despair washing over me, Patrick spoke up. "Ya know, maybe you could find him with like one of those phone tracking thingies."

I sat up, thinking it over. "Maybe..." I said, not wanting to make it seem like my hopes were rising, even though if my hopes were a wave, they could easily wipe out a large village by this point. I quickly texted my mother.

Hey, weird question, but do you still have that tracker on our phones?

I waited eagerly for a response.

Patrick started,"What are you-"

"Shhhh," I shushed him urgently.

"What? Why?" He asked, befuddlement clear in his voice.

I ignored him as I opened the message from my mother immediately after hearing it ding.

Yeah so don't get into any trouble... I'll know where you're at and what you're doing.

I read the message twice, before typing a reply, quickly.

Can u trakc Mikey fr me ,? I want to vissit himn.

Ignoring my typos, I clicked 'Send'.

"Did you figure something out?" Patrick asked, curiously.

"Uh, yeah," I said, looking up at him, unable to contain my excitement upon realizing I still had hope. "I think my mother can tell me-" I was cut off by my phone chiming.

I quickly unlocked my phone and slowly said, "uh, where... He is," as I read the message.

Sure, Sweetie! Glad to know you and your brother are staying close! Tell him we say hi and we love him! And tell him he should visit more often! I'm dying to know more about that new management job of his!

I snorted when I read the last sentence.

"What?" Patrick asked.

"Apparently Mikey told our parents that he's got some fancy new management job. Jesus fucking Christ," I sighed, clicking on the picture she sent.

"The only thing he's managing is managing to fit 3 dicks in himself at once," Patrick muttered, causing me to choke on air as I started laughing.

"God," I sighed, wiping tears from my eyes as my laughter died down. "I never wanted to picture my brother taking any dicks at all." I shuddered.

I looked at the digital map that my mother had sent a picture of. It had two markers on it: One at my location at my university in California and one in Nevada.