All your flaws and scars are mine (Namkook)

Chapter 10: Namkook

Jungkook

Dimples:

Love comes quietly,

finally, drops

about me, on me,

in the old ways.

What did I know

thinking myself

able to go

alone all the way.

Jungkook sets his phone down and turns to bury his face in his pillow with a squeal. He kicks his legs as he rolls around from side to side, a smile splitting his face so wide that his cheeks begin to hurt. The beating of his heart against his ribs makes him feel all tingly inside. He's happier than he has been in a very long time. The kind of happiness where he goes to sleep feeling a warm glow surrounding him, knowing he'll wake up with a smile on his face, thoughts of Namjoon and their future together circling his mind.

He goes back to the message Namjoon left for him that morning. A cheesy love poem by Robert Creeley pops up on his screen—so very Namjoon. He didn't know Namjoon could be so romantic. Every day, Jungkook is surprised to find out more and more things about Namjoon that he wouldn't have known if they were just friends. Intimate things that make butterflies unfurl in his stomach while he lies in bed with a goofy grin.

Like how Namjoon kisses: gently at first, almost tentative, then growing more domineering and intense, letting out little noises of satisfaction in the back of his throat. As if with every noise he made, he were praising Jungkook with a good boy. As if attempting to commit the contour of his lips and the flavor of his tongue to memory. Now, as Jungkook lies in bed with his eyes closed, he skims his lips with his fingertips, the thought of it making goosebumps erupt on his skin.

Learning about other, more carnal details about Namjoon has been, for lack of a better word, a breathtaking experience. Namjoon loves cleaning him up with his tongue, licking cum off Jungkook the moment they're done. When Namjoon's kinky side manifested itself one night, Jungkook had a visceral urge to jump on his dick again, despite feeling overstimulated and sensitive from the mind-blowing orgasm he had just experienced.

It also evoked unexpected kinks in Jungkook that he never got the opportunity to explore when he started having sex. To be that open and vulnerable with another person was too risky for Jungkook, and he could never trust anyone enough. Namjoon, however, isn't just anyone. He's the one. And together, they're having fun exploring.

Jungkook has also learned he can tell when Namjoon is feeling nervous or upset. He'll withdraw into himself, becoming quiet when there's something bothering him or on his mind. Jungkook will hug him tightly and become a grounding source for him until Namjoon can open up and talk about it. He loves that he can be that for Namjoon, just as he was all those years ago for a shy and quiet Jungkook. That he trusts Jungkook enough to be vulnerable with him.

However, it's been a little over a month. A month of them sneaking around, and Jungkook is still too chicken shit to tell Taehyung that he's fucking his older brother. Well, he wouldn't put it like that. It's not just fucking . It's a lot more than that. They're boyfriends. Jungkook squeals into his pillow again, reminding himself of those corny romance movies Jimin enjoys watching so much. However, he knows that for this to work, for this to have a future, they need to come clean.

Eventually.

For right now, Jungkook is enjoying the sneaking around, the quiet giggles as Namjoon creeps into his apartment, while on the look-out for any sign Jimin and Taehyung are home. The times when they all go out together and they sneak furtive glances over the rims of their drinks, hands linked under the table when they have the opportunity to do so, then pretend to take separate cabs home, just for Namjoon to once again slip into Jungkook's apartment with a smug grin and deep dimples. Dimples that Jungkook can't help but press kisses to every time they pop out because—now he can.