15th December. A hall in Rugard. A table is in the centre with dark flowers and two candles. A lamentful flute plays in the background.
Enter JESTER comically
JESTER: [he laughs maniacally] There once lived a count
Who instead of a mouth had a snout,
Pride bloated him.
His mind sprung a whim.
By acting on't,
A wife and daughter were thrown in a pit.
An enemy then fled
As the count mentally bled,
His trusters went away,
For they got little pay. [he laughs]
Enter COURTIER & GUARD with less armour
[JESTER hides behind a curtain]
COURTIER: What a pity 'tis that th'Count is in this state. He has been in such a groggy and choleric mood for a few days now.
GUARD: True it is, but we've won. It is best that we celebrate for this whole week. It was a great battle. If I counted correctly, I am certain that I killed over a dozen of those Pagans. Here take this. [he hands COURTIER a cup] We shall drink ourselves to death quicker than our enemies shall kill us.
Enter BISHOP
Greetings, thy grace. How art thou?
BISHOP: I am in a most stately mood. I still cannot believe it how Arkona was untouched in this whole conflict. These are the most bless'd news that one can receive.
GUARD: Dost thou want some wine to commemorate this?
BISHOP: Nay, I shall refrain from consuming such commodities. Have any of ye seen Wizlaw?
[JESTER reveals himself]
JESTER: O, I have seen him dear Wratislaw. He is still weeping over his losses in the room next door!
BISHOP: Well, that is a pity. I do sure hope that he gets well soon.
Enter WIZLAW
[drums begin to play in the background]
WIZLAW: What is all this noise that ye are making in here?! Why can a man not rest in peace over such a tragedy?
BISHOP: We was just worrying about thee.
WIZLAW: Is that so?
GUARD: Aye, it is.
WIZLAW: [to COURTIER:] Thou's callous! Why dost thou drink and celebrate on this day?! If thou thinks this is a reason for joy, then thou is dismissed from thy post! [he takes the cup and throws it]
COURTIER: My liege, I-I had no intention of celebrating anything-.
[WIZLAW grabs COURTIER]
Ah! Help!
GUARD: [to WIZLAW:] My lord I implore thee to let go. [to BISHOP:] Thine excellency, say something.
BISHOP: [to WIZLAW:] Liege, let go of the man for he did nothing. [to GUARD:] How about thou dost something. Thou art the man of conflict not me.
[JESTER laughs]
GUARD: [to JESTER:] Do not laugh fool. Help me break this up.
[GUARD & JESTER break up WIZLAW & COURTIER. COURTIER is thrown onto the table]
COURTIER: Ow! My neck's been agonised.
WIZLAW: This suffering of thine is not greater than mine. For commemorating such an event, thou deserves an even greater pain.
[Exit WIZLAW
COURTIER: [to GUARD:] Look what thou didst to me. His excellency also could of suffered from such an attack as thou tempted him to drink as well.
GUARD: Why blame me? Thou agreed to drink.
BISHOP: Please, gentlemen. Stop this minimal dispute and let's talk in a civilised manner on Wizlaw.
JESTER: The Count's kin were killed like cattle callously and the courtier decides to carry a commemoration. I do not see how thee dost not understand this. Is God's wisdom not reaching thee because of thy mitre?
BISHOP: What art thou saying?
JESTER: A cat can creep into a carriage but a serpent can not.
BISHOP: [visibly puzzled] Thou art not being-.
JESTER: If a lark is in the sky during a royal hunt, then that is a terrible time for't to be where it is. If the lark is in its den, then it is safe. [pointing:] Look ho! There stands a fallen mast.
[Exit JESTER running
BISHOP: Maybe I need some of this sour wine.
COURTIER: Dost thou not remember what happened just a moment ago?
BISHOP: Didst thou not hear the court jester? God's wisdom is not reaching me through this mitre.
COURTIER: Then take it off.
BISHOP: Then pass the wine.
[they laugh and pour wine]
GUARD: I propose a toast. Let's drink to the Count's and the jester's good health and their steady recovery. Well, maybe not for the fool for he seems doomed to stay like that.
[they laugh & drink]
[Exeunt
YOU ARE READING
The Tragic Fall Of Wizlaw, The Count Of Rügen
Historical FictionRügen is once again on high alert. Rumours of attacks and exclusion heighten the tensions on the isle. Personal issues merge with politics and blood is fated to be shed. The innocent will be the greatest victims and a great figure shall descend into...