Die For You (Ten Days With Austin Sequel)

Destroyed

Three years ago

"Oh my God Esme!" Alaina exclaims when she sees me in the hospital bed. She comes up to my side and hugs me tight and I cry. It hurts to cry but I can't stop.

Austin left me four days ago, he dumped me and flew back to America, he says it was because I slept with Alan but I know it must have been something more. I don't bother calling him, why should I? He won't answer his god damn phone.

"Look, I know it hurts but you can't destroy yourself over it! You're going to kill yourself if you carry on with the pills!" she shouts at me.

I want to die though, I don't want to be here anymore. Why should I have to live in pain? Why can't I just die now? I don't tell her the thoughts running through my head because I know it'll make the situation a lot worse.

"I know! It's my way of coping with it, I'll be fine." I say, exhausted.

"You won't be fine, you need help Esme. You've let it take over your whole life." she tells me and I nod.

I know I need help but I'm just too scared to admit it to myself. I don't want to be locked up and have tests done on me again, I can't deal with it all.

Austin's POV

"Dude, where are you?" Alan asks me down the phone. I haven't turned my phone on since I left London. I turn it on today and I get bombarded with voicemails, texts and missed calls. I should've kept it off.

"I'm in California." I tell him.

"Why!? You've left Esme and now she's in hospital, what's wrong with you!" He's screaming down the phone.

"That's not my fault, she's the one who got herself in hospital, I'm not flying all the way back to London to visit her, she's not my girlfriend." I say back.

"That was a pretty shitty way of dumping her wasn't it? By writing a letter. She hasn't spoken to anyone in four days and now she's in hospital because she took an overdose. Well done!" he says.

"Well I can't do anything about it, I'm in America." I say.

I just need to get over her, she shouldn't be the one upset, I'm the one who's heart is broken.

Alan's still shouting at me but I'm not really listening, I put the phone down on him, lie back down on my bed and turn my phone off. I don't need any more interruptions.

I need to carry on with life like it was before I met Esme because I know if I keep thinking about her, I won't get anywhere.