chelsea

lowkey

There is someone who will forever be in my mind. She's not overly interesting, not in society's perfect body shape, not that smart either, and not that enthusiastic about anything. We talked and called a couple of times over the span of 3 years. She's cities further away from me but I never would have thought that we would see each other till now. It was quarter to 12 in the evening when I drank the last bit of beer that my friends told me to chug down. We were having a party since one of our friends was going away to live in another country. That's when I received a call from her, which I was taken by. She usually sleeps at a time like this but whatever, right? I picked it up when I heard her voice, it made me drunk. " I'm by the 7/11 in this place, Meet me"

" What do you mean, meet you? You live 1000 km away from me. Stupid" " I'm really here and I'm not lying. I'll even send you a photo" She hangs up the call as I look through the screen to see the place. It was actually here. Without a doubt, I left the party without saying anything to them. Hop on my bike and drove off through the rainy weather. It was like I drank a lot of caffeine that without 30 mins I didn't realize that I eventually reached my destination. I panted and coughed for a bit while strolling with my bike and got this, I was wet but I didn't seem to mind.

When suddenly, someone called me from the back. I immediately looked to see a woman wearing a white dress with black block heels that matched her umbrella. She wasn't smiling when she finally saw me in person which I expected but I froze. I just stood there watching her when she suddenly just appeared in front of me and I didn't notice it at all. " You good?"

" Ah-ye-yeah. W-why-shit."

" No shit, you are wet. What the hell were you thinking about not wearing some sort of helmet?" She shared her umbrella as I just stared at her. " Since when did you gain weight?" The first time we met for chatting for 3 years and that's all that I just fucking asked. What a stupid asshole, right? " Since last year big dumb, I told you about it didn't I?"

" Well, you still are beautiful"

" Hmm? Nope. Shut up and park up your bike. I'll be waiting there, here take this" She pointed up to the bench near the glass door of the convenience store as I nodded in response. She ran there and waited while I took my time despite the fact that I park a bike for a maximum of 10 secs but because I was nervous, it took me entirely a minute. I fixed my hair and patted my small mustache and just went on to her. " You really are beautiful"

" No. Just seat down and stop acting like a creep or I'll report you to that boy over that counter who is looking over here"

" Why is he looking over here?" I look at the guy who seems to be not in the mood to talk to me. He was angry or something but I also didn't care. " What do you mean?" " Oh, he asked for my name and number but I gave him yours"

" WHAT?"

" Kidding" She laughs like we were friends for years more than what my friends and I had. She was getting comfortable actually and I kinda like it a little bit. " Since when did you arrived?"

" Just an hour ago, I didn't want to see you right away since I don't like it but why not just see you right now?"

" That's fucking harsh" She laughs again but this time she stared at me for a bit. " You were fine with your photos back then, what happened now?"

" Work and school? Or maybe because there is no girl loving me and so I look ugly"

" So if a woman is loving you? Then you'll look good? Is that what love is all about?"

" Well, love is blind, don't they say?"

" They do say, I did give you a mutual feeling but you still look like this"

" What? What do you mean like this?"

" Nervous. You look nervous when we clearly know each other for decent years."

" Because I did- You could've just said you were coming! I should have cut my hair, shaved my mustache, bought new clothes and perfume."

" Right. But I didn't because I knew you were doing that but anyways, you're still you despite whatever changes happening in your face-"

" Well at least, I'll look decent rather than being here wet and dumb" She went silent. She just stared at me for a moment and her hand reached out to touch my wet hair. She pushed it back and pat my head, " I'm sorry if you think that I called you ugly, I'm also ugly "

" I am ugly"

" Maybe you are, there is no beauty. Beauty is never someone that subjects alright? You know why people think that beautiful people are beautiful because they are known. Noticeable with their features and stereotypes begin to pile up that it begins to be true but really, nothing is true. "

" But even if you gained weight, I-I-I can-I mean- argh! I want to hug you"

" I know but you can't." She grabbed something from her pocket and it was a silver lighter and a pack of cigarettes that I had never seen before. " This is my gift but don't smoke it. Keep it and by the time I leave you, smoke it out"

" What that fuck is this all about again?" She shrugged her shoulders and pointed to the lighter. " Use this though, I know you have a pack in your pocket"

" I finished it yesterday-"

" Go buy a new one" She placed a hundred bills on the table but I disregarded it and left the table to buy myself a cigarette. The moment I reached the cashier, he gave me something and it was a pack of cigarettes of my choice. " She paid for it an hour ago."

" What?"

" She bought this for you, okay man?" He somewhat looked pissed but even if I talked back. It didn't make sense but then my eyes caught a glimpse of a chocolate bar. I grab two of them, " Then these two"

" 8 bucks" I paid 10 and he gave me 2 bucks in change as I took it and walked through the door to see her sleeping. She had her head down with her right-hand index finger tapping at the lighter. " You bought another cigarette from me"

" Yeah, I did" She responded without looking at me but I just sat down. " Will you smoke it for me, please?" I place the chocolate bar near her hand as I grab the lighter and flick it. " this looks really expensive" " It is expensive and I know you would pay me but I don't need your money"

I open the pack and grab one stick, placing it inside my lip enough to hold. As I flick the fire through the other end smoke gasps out. " Good, just do that and I'll sleep here" She went silent as I looked at the other pack that she gave me. It was somewhat foreign, too foreign that I don't understand. " Can I touch your hand?" I asked honestly but she didn't reply.

" This is your fault that I came here"

" What do you mean?"

" I heard that you had someone other than me in mind"

" What?"

" I know. I don't have the right but you should've told me"

" There is absolutely no one!" There is. She's the complete opposite of this woman in front of me, she's really in love with me but I don't. It feels sick whenever I'm in a relationship where I actively give my passion for my lover, they tear me down. But not fucked up as what this woman did to me. We weren't lovers but we acted like one.

" Don't you want to kiss me?" she said as she lifted her hand she slowly pulled herself up and looked at me as I smoked. I hate her face to be honest, in how she enjoys giving her what she wants. She wants death, that's why she wanted to finally see me. I knew it, I fucking knew it. " I fucking do"

" Then do it" She closes her eyes as she pouts her lips. I chuckle for a bit but then I coolly place my stick of bud down and lean into her lips for a peck. " That was quick" She stared at me once again with those cold fixated eyes at me and pulled me so close that she kissed me so hard that I didn't fight back.

Later, she pulls out and smiles while I can feel a warm sensation on my face. " I don't love you, don't think that I do"

" I know" Then we kissed once again.