ℂ𝕃𝕆𝕎ℕ| Kaz Brekker

Not Just Alive but Living

𝔼𝕧𝕚𝕝𝕪𝕟𝕟 ℙ𝕚𝕖𝕤𝕥

I CLOSED MY EYES and listened to everyone talking on the other side of the door. "Pekka made a move on more than just the crow club while we were away. He bought out all of Fifth Harbor."

Jesper's tone was unusual, especially towards Kaz. "You know Evilynn took some serious damage. The novice nearly lost his head, the heartrender took a bullet, Inej was stabbed, but no worries. As long as you're on top of Pekka's corporate holdings."

"You don't take down a lion by cutting off it's tail."

"I'm sorry, you've been on a safari when?" Jesper was genuinely mad this time, "we're putting our lives on the line!"

"I thought you preferred it that way?" Kas snapped back.

Inej stayed by my side, but Nina joined the men and was asked by who I assumed to be Wylan. "Is she going to be okay? That's Evilynn right?"

"I wouldn't call myself the most proficient healer, but she's not going to become a permanent resident here." That was a step in the right direction I suppose. Now I was cold and sore, but she'd done a good job removing the feeling of death.

I didn't listen for a while, resting my head against the wall I looked over at Inej. "What... what is Kaz doing?" I just then truly realized how much it drained me just to speak, but I wanted to know.

She shook her head and sighed, "I don't know."

I stared at the ceiling, my knees against my chest, for just a moment when Kaz yelled, "That's enough!" He quickly sent Jesper and Wylan off somewhere and I returned to my thoughts.

When I looked to my side again Inej was gone, but I expected it. She had a tendency to disappear. The only person left in the shed was Kaz, but I doubted he wanted to talk. He hadn't even wanted to look at me. And now I was just laying in a pile of linen and cloth bandage.

But to my surprise he walked in, "Evilynn?"

His eyes fluttered over me, I could feel it, but they didn't hold a stare for long. I tried to smile, but it probably looked even worse.

𝕂𝕒𝕫 𝔹𝕣𝕖𝕜𝕜𝕖𝕣

Despite the blood and bandage and pain her smile was still perfect. Not her stage smile, not the one I saw at the circus with Jesper. That wasn't Pekka's rabbit, that was my manipulator. I couldn't get a word out, she looked half dead, and I would know. The sleeplessness in her eyes, the hastily cleaned cuts on her face, her shaking hands. 

𝔼𝕧𝕚𝕝𝕪𝕟𝕟 ℙ𝕚𝕖𝕤𝕥

My smile quickly faded and I became uncharacteristically serious. "Kaz, I was kidnapped and tortured over your feud with Rollins. I don't have a future okay? But the others do, Jesper, Inej, Nina and Wylan seem like good people. They don't deserve to have that cut short because you have a nasty grudge. Saints, Kaz, tell me what this is all about, I need to know it's more than a petty fucking fight I'm dying for." Pain struck my side, but I assumed it was just aching.

 "Evilynn," my name rang from his lips, "your side."

I glanced down at my blood soaked shirt and sighed. Lifting it and removing the scarce bandage, ripping some of my skin off with it. I winced, when I only glanced at Kaz he was looking away, staring at the door frame. When he spoke it was like time stood still.

"Pekka Rollins killed my brother." The pain in his voice shook me. I repeated the line in my head, Kaz wasn't fighting Rollins for money, for power or fame, but for justice, for revenge.