Most Everything (Hartbig AU)

v.

Again, NSSF. It gets kinda messy. Sorry 'bout it.

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/ I hear she's beautiful / a twenty out of ten / that doesn't keep me from / wondering how you've been /

Just Like Me --- Betty Who

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I hit the call button.

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"Hello?"

"Hi," I whispered.

"Who is this? It's two am," she grumbled.

I smiled despite who I was talking to. "It's Grace. Caller ID, Han."

"Oh yeah." Suddenly it registered who she was on the phone with. "Oh. Hi. It's kind of late, what are you doing up?"

"We need to talk."

I could feel her nod. "We do."

"I- I heard you were- you're seeing someone." I blurted, and Mamrie shook her head at me desperately. Not the right direction. I desperately rushed out a new topic. "But that's not important. Can you come over? I want to do this in person."

"Sure. I'm assuming Mamrie is there?" I nodded, before remembering she couldn't see me, but she was still talking. "There's no way you would have done this out of the blue."

A month apart and she still knew me too well.

"I'll be there soon."

"Okay," I whispered, suddenly nervous.

"Oh, and Grace? Stop drinking. I want to have a semi-sober conversation."

I forced a laughed. "See you soon."

"Yeah."

And with the that, she was gone.

When she arrived, Mamrie wouldn't even let me get the door. Hannah was led back to the living room, shoes off and jacket on the coat rack in the hall. Her t-shirt was wrinkled and her sweatpants hung off of her hips slightly. Her hair was back in a bun, adorable in only a way she could pull off. I could feel her soaking me in as much as I was enjoying her presence.

"Okay, here's what's going to happen. I'm going to mediate. The two of you are going to take turns saying exactly what you want to say, and I mean what your heart wants to say, not what your brain tells you to. I'm recording this all on my phone for future reference. Nobody starts until I say so."

"Damn, Mamrie, you're prepared." I stifled a laugh.

"It's hard to have best friends when they won't fucking talk to each other, damn right I'm prepared." She sighed. "Who's first?"

"Me," Hannah said quietly.

"Alright. This conversation is now recording. Anything you say can and will be used against you or for you. Speak wisely."

She took a deep breath. "It all started that first night of Playlist, I think. At first I thought I was just nervous because it was the first time we were really hanging out, but that feeling didn't go away. Two months later was our first collab. I guess even before that, though, we were kind of always orbiting around one another. You came with me to shoot MDK with Jenna. I was so drunk but all I could remember was wanting to decorate that cake, and realizing how cute your laugh was." She let herself relax a little bit. "The next day, I woke up and that was all I could remember. That was the first time I realized I didn't want to be in a platonic relationship with you."

"God, Han, that was three fucking years ago," I mumbled. "Do you really remember it like that?"

"Those are the only two things I remember from that night, I swear on my million subs plaque." She smiled slightly.

Shit.

How had I not realized it for two whole years? Was I really that dense?

"Um, okay, now it's your turn," she said looking down, clearly embarrassed.

"I- Should I start from my beginning or the most recent shit?"

"Start from now, I want the air cleared of whatever the hell is going on," cut in Mamrie.

"'Moderator' my ass," I grumbled. She smiled weakly but made a gesture clearly telling me to get on with it.

"Well, besides the fact that I was miserable the whole time we weren't talking, the most obvious thing to me was that I hated your video with Ingrid. It was very cute and unfairly adorable like usual, blah blah blah, but I hated how flirty you got with her." I took a deep breath. Emotional heart-pour-outs were definitely not my thing, and they had happened way too many times in the recent past for my liking. But if I wanted anything to go right, I had to go through with this. "I wanted it to be me you were 'accidentally' bumping into. I wanted it to be me you were talking to about nerdy TV shows with. But it wasn't, so I felt more miserable. And that's kind of when I really realized what the hell was happening. I'm honestly kind of scared and still getting over it myself, but that's what's up. And looking back on us in general, everything all makes sense, I guess."

Mamrie nodded in agreement. "Basically what you've told me. Fair play. Hannah?"

"Grace..." She couldn't meet my eyes. "Ingrid and I are together."

My heart felt a million pounds heavier. I couldn't look at her anymore. I found myself staring at the ground.

"And she makes me really happy and I love being around her but she's not you, Grace, I want to be around you like that."

And just like that, the weight was lifted again. I looked up to Hannah, who was waiting to continue until we had made eye contact.

"And I know I'm rambling and not making much sense and I'm a mess but I'm your mess and I always have been, god, I've always been here for whatever you needed and I always thought you were The One, capital T capital O, because I've never felt this way about anyone before." She buried her face in her hands and tugged at her hair. "Meeting at Playlist was not an accident or coincidence or chance, it was fate. The three of us are meant to be best friends, and damnit Helbig, I've always had this feeling about you, this knowledge that the two of us have some sort of connection. And at this point I can't really change that idea, it's so deeply rooted in my mind; I'm so in love with you I don't know what to do anymore."